My cousin's parents both died relatively young (mom first, then father). My cousin late 30s when her mom (my dad's sister) died. I don't know the exact amount she inherited, but her parent's house was valued at over $2 million, was paid off and the dad was a hotshot surgeon who had a garage full of cars, tons of stocks, CDs, bonds. I was never privy to the full amount but it was supposedly over $3 million.
5 years later, she's dead broke. Blew through it all on extravagant travel, asinine business ventures, giving money to her friends, putting her 3 kids in a very expensive prep school and probably drugs/booze. Her husband's a deadbeat who bounces between low paying jobs. She called me last night asking for an emergency loan to pay for her $4000/month apartment lease this month (she sold her parent's house years ago). She left a voicemail and I haven't responded. What's the best action here?
cousin blew through $2-$3 million inheritance, now hitting me up for cash. I cannot believe it
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amadeus ex machina wrote:
My cousin's parents both died relatively young (mom first, then father). My cousin late 30s when her mom (my dad's sister) died. I don't know the exact amount she inherited, but her parent's house was valued at over $2 million, was paid off and the dad was a hotshot surgeon who had a garage full of cars, tons of stocks, CDs, bonds. I was never privy to the full amount but it was supposedly over $3 million.
5 years later, she's dead broke. Blew through it all on extravagant travel, asinine business ventures, giving money to her friends, putting her 3 kids in a very expensive prep school and probably drugs/booze. Her husband's a deadbeat who bounces between low paying jobs. She called me last night asking for an emergency loan to pay for her $4000/month apartment lease this month (she sold her parent's house years ago). She left a voicemail and I haven't responded. What's the best action here?
You think if you gave her $4,000 to pay for the lease that it would be a one time thing? Tell her to tell her husband to get a job and pay for the lease. Tell her and her deadbeat husband to lay off the drugs and act like responsible parents. They are pathetic. Tell her that. -
Tell her to move and make better choices
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RunnerSam wrote:
Tell her to move and make better choices
I would, but she has 3 kids. It's not fair to them to put them through hell just becuase their parents suck -
She better earn that 4k/month. The rub-n-tug in florida was charging $59, you do the math
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amadeus ex machina wrote:
RunnerSam wrote:
Tell her to move and make better choices
I would, but she has 3 kids. It's not fair to them to put them through hell just becuase their parents suck
Those kids will be no better or worse off no matter how much you waste on this person. Keep your money. -
Yeah as sad as this is for the kids this is not your problem and no amount of money you give them will fix it so don't even bother. You're just setting yourself up for more and ever increasing requests.
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Who gives cousins money?
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If you do give her money, make it a gift, not a loan. You know you aren't going to be repaid, so why not just be honest with yourself and her from the beginning instead of pretending it's a loan and worrying about getting paid back.
That said, I wouldn't give or loan the money. Just respond and offer to help her find a cheaper place to live. "Sorry to hear about your difficulty. I can't give you any money, but I'd be glad to take a day to help out with apartment shopping as you try to find a living situation that better fits your current budget." -
Don't feed the bears
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amadeus ex machina wrote:
My cousin's parents both died relatively young (mom first, then father). My cousin late 30s when her mom (my dad's sister) died. I don't know the exact amount she inherited, but her parent's house was valued at over $2 million, was paid off and the dad was a hotshot surgeon who had a garage full of cars, tons of stocks, CDs, bonds. I was never privy to the full amount but it was supposedly over $3 million.
5 years later, she's dead broke. Blew through it all on extravagant travel, asinine business ventures, giving money to her friends, putting her 3 kids in a very expensive prep school and probably drugs/booze. Her husband's a deadbeat who bounces between low paying jobs. She called me last night asking for an emergency loan to pay for her $4000/month apartment lease this month (she sold her parent's house years ago). She left a voicemail and I haven't responded. What's the best action here?
Call her back, tell her you aren't in the enabling business....sorry. -
This is what we refer to as redistribution of wealth. A fool and their money are soon parted.
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Tell her that’s what banks are for, and that there is nothing you have seen in the way she handles money that gives you any confidence you’ll get paid back. Also tell her to make the hubby get a job, it has never been easier to get one than right now with the low unemployment rate.
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Recommend troll posting on lrc. Oh, you already did. 1/10
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amadeus ex machina wrote:
My cousin's parents both died relatively young (mom first, then father). My cousin late 30s when her mom (my dad's sister) died. I don't know the exact amount she inherited, but her parent's house was valued at over $2 million, was paid off and the dad was a hotshot surgeon who had a garage full of cars, tons of stocks, CDs, bonds. I was never privy to the full amount but it was supposedly over $3 million.
5 years later, she's dead broke. Blew through it all on extravagant travel, asinine business ventures, giving money to her friends, putting her 3 kids in a very expensive prep school and probably drugs/booze. Her husband's a deadbeat who bounces between low paying jobs. She called me last night asking for an emergency loan to pay for her $4000/month apartment lease this month (she sold her parent's house years ago). She left a voicemail and I haven't responded. What's the best action here?
If this was for a one-time sort of expense (like maybe a medical procedure), that would be one thing, although I still probably wouldn't give the money unless it was quite serious. However, the fact that it is for rent means she isn't in a financially stable position. There is going to be another rent payment next month and the month after that. This is much worse than a person who can afford their normal expenses but needs help with an unusual circumstance.
I think you already know the answer. -
Tell her that you can barely afford your own rent.
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joedirt wrote:
This is what we refer to as redistribution of wealth. A fool and their money are soon parted.
That's actually not what is meant by the term "redistribution of wealth" at all.
To the OP, of course you shouldn't give that person any money. -
Tell us more about this hotshot surgeon
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I would say I cannot believe it if stories like this weren't so common. If I inherited even 500,000 dollars I could live well the rest of my life (I would still work).
The best and only action I think is appropriate is to say tough luck in whatever way you choose. The only exception would be if she gave you more than $4000 of her money previously, and even that would not necessarily warrant you giving her a dime if you didn't want to. You are absolutely not responsible for the consequences of her idiotic actions. -
amadeus ex machina wrote:
She left a voicemail and I haven't responded. What's the best action here?
She's being extremely inconsiderate and offensive to you.
I'd call her back, say I can't help you, hope you get it all sorted out - and hang up.
