My spouse is in a bad mood most all of the time. She comes from upper class wealth. A US citizen, but educated k-12 outside of the US at a prestigious and very rigorous foreign private school. She went to top ranked university in the US with a considerable number of wealthy students, of which she was one. She regrets marrying me because I come from a dysfunctional family (poverty, drugs,, alcohol. vicious violence and abuse, and on and on). She regrets that I was once an athlete (Div. 1 scholarship) because it makes her feel insecure given her complete lack of interest in sports or physical activity. . She also resents my educational attainment, which has even surprised me, incorrectly conflating it with a high IQ and all that, but really, I just focused in school like I did in athletics, and found that very few really focus with the right intensity in school. It is not intelligence, or at least not of the extraordinary kind. But again the real source of regret is my family (which I did not choose). I do exceedingly well financially - long in the top 1% but feeling like an imposter because I know I am from the wrong side of the tracks. I foolishly thought she would admire my coming from nothing and being on my own since the age of 18 without any help, but I lack the social graces of the upper middle or upper classes and that is her perception. By the way, I carry none of my family's habits - don't drink at all or do drugs, don't philander, put my kids first and put them through great colleges, no debt for them or me, entirely paid on a very nice house and literally on credit reports debt is at zero percent of income. I made sure she always had the car she wanted - I bought the used one. Lots and lots of money in the bank and in retirement funds - someone like me always lives in fear of a looming disaster. I feel like an idiot for thinking this was the way to be respected - not so. I long ago gave up trying to fight her regret, as I can't do anything about my family. I frequently have to call my mother, (who is in assisted living and as can be expected from someone who has made numerous questionable life decisions, doing very poorly) in the car on the way home from work so my wife does not get angry. She doesn't want or doesn't like a person like me who hustled to make it, and really wishes she had married someone of her faith and culture and status. Her mother is a Holocaust survivor, and while I am not the least bit religious in any way, I wonder how she processes me - there is lkely some prejudice there. She has a wonderful social life, but I can't join it because she speaks so poorly of me to her friends it is way too uncomfortable. Her friends when I do meeting them appear shocked that I am friendly and easygoing - it is just painful all around. It goes without saying one needs to be extremely careful of whom you marry, and for a guy, preferably wait until 30 or older. My constant thought is how much happier I would have been just staying single all these years.