Boyfriend went to an all night party and now can't make it to lunch with my parents. How do I deal with this?

Just tell him to P I I Y B and I bet he will call you or just come over

annoyed girlfriend wrote:

I will post the update when we eventually talk though.

Don't bother.

Not a bad trolling effort this far, but getting a bit ordinary now.

How long has he been sleeping!!!???

So he did text me in the afternoon asking how the lunch went and then also asked if I wanted to go hiking.

Still upset about it and not really feeling in the mood to reply right now. I think I still need to cool off.

Handcuffs, carrot in boot.

Tell him he’s gotta eat the cooch every day for 2 weeks to make it up to ya

I've got a shaven haven, but I'll suggest to him anyway, I think he'll be in it as I've been playing hard to get in that area.

Simply put, DTLRNNFS!!!

beat him

Li’l Jimmy wrote:

Tell him he’s gotta eat the cooch every day for 2 weeks to make it up to ya

annoyed girlfriend wrote:

I've got a shaven haven, but I'll suggest to him anyway, I think he'll be in it as I've been playing hard to get in that area.

I suggested it to him, he said that's one daily lunch he won't be missing out on, but put in the proviso "as long as your parents aren't around".

I'm in Johannesburg, South Africa. I were anywhere close to you I'd ask you out on a date and try to snatch you from this lazy-ass! All he needs is a few hours of sleep and a stop-by Star Bucks for a good cup of coffee on his way to your house.

I bet this is a guy that can't even run a 5k?

annoyed girlfriend wrote:

So he did text me in the afternoon asking how the lunch went and then also asked if I wanted to go hiking.

Still upset about it and not really feeling in the mood to reply right now. I think I still need to cool off.

His name's not Jamin is it?

Most female posters on letsrun attempt to hide their gender identity on letsrun. The female posters who self-label as female on letsrun want to stay away from sexual communications with other letsrun posters. You have a masculine gusto as if you were born a man. Am I correct?

It's important to ascertain whether:

a) meeting your parents is so intimidating that it caused this young man to binge drink; or

b) the evening/early morning was so joyous that it was essential that the young man to partake in festivities until 6:00 am.

Either of the above are reasonable excuses for the young man's conduct.

I wouldn't be making up excuses. I would just tell your parents "He was out late and isn't going to be able to make it".

How would I handle it? The fact that you don't want to get angry or yell is really awesome (it never makes sense to get angry or yell). I agree you want to convey to him your disappointed. Especially since he has already expressed "uh oh, I fucked up" I would tell him you're glad he had fun, but that this lunch was important to you, mention that it didn't feel good to have to cancel/make excuses/lie for him and that you would love it if he could be more careful in the future.

Given what you already said he will agree with you and apologize again. From there just see his reaction. If he doesn't do something like this again, it's a strong sign he cares about you AND making the relationship work. If it happens again, I still wouldn't yell or get upset. No good comes of it and its damn near impossible to change someone. You'd either need to start accepting this is just how he is and will be, or if something like that is a deal-breaker, consider moving on.

Seriously. Is this really such a concern in your life that you can't resolve yourself or a friend and instead need to post on a message board?? Good luck when you really need to worry about real life issues in the future

you are missing the bigger issue wrote:

annoyed girlfriend wrote:

He went to a party last evening and then I got a text around 6-7 AM saying he just got back from the party

You realize he cheated on you, right?

This is pretty obvious.

The guy says he was too messed up for lunch, but two hours later is is all good for a hike???

It the issue was just the effects of partying, anyone worth being with would put on his big-boy pants and get through the lunch, even if it took an Oscar-worthy performance.

More likely he woke up with someone else and was headed home from cheating on the OP, which would spook most guys into making an excuse for being out late. He then tried to cement the story by cancelling out on lunch - "Look, I really am in such a bad way here! Really! Believe me!"

The fact that OP says he is a "nice guy" only reinforces it. A less nice guy, a true player (who the OP's BF isn't...yet), would just go to the lunch like nothing happened. But as a nice guy he spent the morning stressing.

annoyed girlfriend wrote:

So he did text me in the afternoon asking how the lunch went and then also asked if I wanted to go hiking.

I had an employee who called in sick, and that afternoon a co-worker showed me the same guy's Instagram posts skiing all day.

Fired.

I get why you are annoyed, but treating this like some kind of "offense" seems a little over the top to me. He stayed out with his friends all night. Big deal. He missed a lunch with your parents. Big deal. I would have told my parents that he stayed out too late with his friends for a special occasion and couldn't make it. If you don't make a big deal out of it, they won't (and if they do, that does not bode well for them staying out of your business in the future). Go hiking. Tell him you wished he hadn't missed lunch and then move on.

FWIW, I've been married 27 years and what your boyfriend did is not even close to some of the dumb ass things my husband did with his friends when we were younger. And, by the way, most people take on more responsibility in terms of job and family as they age. The opportunity to party with friends all night won't last forever. Life is short and times will get hard. He should be able to savor the fun times.