Having a kid, maintaining elite-ish running career, possible?

I think it is possible. I think it depends on how flexible you are in your approach to training and how much non-running work you need to put in. My college times were very similar to your current PRS (I was 4 to 5 seconds slower in each event). Back then, I mostly just ran. No lifting, not much PT, just running, and that was usually limited to 50-55 mpw.

I got away from the sport but came back to it as a masters runner. During that time, I have run age-graded times that are in the same range as what I ran in college. It has taken a lot more work because I have moved up the marathon for the most part, but I have managed to have good success while maintaining a career and being (at least in my worldview) a good husband to my wife and a good father to our three children.

I would say that I probably dedicate between 8 hours on the low side and 15 hours on the high side in any given week to running. When it is in the 8-10 hour range, it is pretty manageable. When it gets above 12 hours, it is really pretty challenging. What that really means is that your life become your family, your job and running, and beers with the guys and going out to catch a game, and dinners out with friends - all those little extraneous things - they fall victim to your new lifestyle. I still have a social life, but it is a family-centric social life where we have other families over to our home for dinner instead of doing the other things I mentioned.

Obviously I was never quite an elite runner, but I hope my experience can still be illustrative of balancing competing priorites.

My question is this:

What will sub 14 and sub 29 get you / why are those running career goals?

I'm not that talented, but I've run well 14:36 / 65:mid. I raced and trained and was close friends with guys who were 13:48 / 28:5x types and you know what their standard of living was compared to mine based only on running? Practically the same.

One of the guys I knew got $500/month from his sponsor + shoes, gear, travel, he was a 13:48/1:03 guy. At the time was a 14:30 /1:06 guy I got shoes, gear.

Knowing this, if you started running 20% more and bumped mileage up or got to around 120 you could probably be a really good Mountain, Ultra, Trail Runner and pick up more money, sponsorships and race deals based on your ability levels that would exceed a typical sub 14 aspiring runner.

Knowing you will soon have a family, likely this is a way for you to use your talents and passion (running) to have fame and prestige. Also as Ive seen with friends who had babies the lack of sleep for the first few months is rough aka shit training. It would lend itself to you getting out the door for 90-120 minutes than you hammering track workouts.

Balancing, 2 hours of running/ day, 40 hours of work a week and a baby is manageable just tough especially when you don't see the light at the end of the tunnel aka the 'glory" that sub 14 will bring you. Get paid if youre going to run that much, or get paid to race in a USA kit or travel to races around the world

Being a father is 1000x better than being a good runner. I've been both. Congrats!

To what end? You aren't going to the Olys or WC with those times. You might win a few local races and beat up in some hobby joggers.

You should probably wait to make any decision until the kid is born. You don't know how it may turn out.

It's not possible to do anything at an elite level with kids unless you have an old fashioned 19th century marriage and pay no attention to them.

Congrats. I have a 2-year old and one on the way, and being a father has been the best experience of my life so far.

Yes, it's possible to train at a high level. I've managed to find time for 90 mpw, and running has never taken away from my responsibilities as a father.

1) I'm out the door at 4:30am M-F. Sat/Sun I sleep in till 5am and I'm home by the time baby wakes up

2) I add 3 evening runs a week, and most times I bring the baby in the jogging stroller, or else wait till baby is in bed

3) 3 quality sessions a week plus a Sunday long run

4) When she can, my wife bikes with us on the evening runs

You can make it work, though it may take some adjustment.

Kids ruin everything. Sorry, man. You should have had yourself snipped.

You can balance life as a Dad and a runner, there will definitely be a point of struggle trying to find that balance. You'll have to be up before baby and mom (assuming you're living together) then fit in a second run when you can. Don't be selfish about your running, I know it's important to you, but your role in this child's life is much more important. Don't lose sight of that.

Sure it is possible.

It requires flexibility on you and the GF's part along with lots of communication and probably more planning than you are accustomed to doing.

While I was not as fast as you, I trained for several marathons as a dad. We both also worked (although her's was contract and pretty flexible). We sat down every Sunday night and went over the upcoming week and planned out what needed to get done and then I worked my runs (55-70 mpw) around the schedule. I also traveled a good deal and got it done.

Wait.

Are you working or trying to make a career of running?

DAD not DONOR wrote:

Don't be selfish about your running, I know it's important to you, but your role in this child's life is much more important.

Careful how far you take that. You can have wonderful experiences by including your children in your hobbies. As with most things, balance is key.

With only one child it probably is possible. However, it's very hard to answer this question without having an idea of what your work responsibilities are.

I'm nowhere near as talented as you are but I maintain 60mpw with a full schedule. I'm not elite either.

I work roughly 40-50 hours a week, I'm married, and we have a one-year old, I commute 90 minutes a day for week (45 minutes into the city, 45 minutes back to my house). I'm also working on a startup doing Data Mining.

I get in the miles any way I can. Getting up at 4:30am is the best way because the baby gets up at 6:00-6:30am and goes to bed around 7:30pm. I run on my lunch breaks on a treadmill and do 2-3 hard workouts per week. I skip Saturdays and sleep in and do long runs at 4:30am on Sundays.

You can make it happen. Set a schedule.

My advice is to talk to your GF and work on a schedule on what times you plan on running, but also make sure to schedule time with her as well. She and baby are the most important. There is such a thing as a "running widow" and if she has resentment towards your running or any of your hobbies you are in for miserable relationship.

You need ~90-120 mins day to be a pretty elite runner. You can do that with a kid if it is a priority. Most people chose to watch tv or play video games instead. Or post on letsrun

I'm not sure if the op ever returned.

At any rate, just wanted to point out that in addition to the responses above saying that you can be elite with children, I would point out there are some pro runners with children. Rupp, Mo both have kids.

There are some women pros with children too, but I can't think of who off the top of my head.

You're asking for parenting advice on Letsrun? Man you've got bigger problems than you realize.If you want to be a good dad, do what you want while still being respectful of your wife (#1) and your kid (#2). Always be respectful of your partner and kids HOWEVER giving up on your dreams is not what being a good father is about. My dad did his Masters when I was about 8 years old and he was at work all day and then he would be home sometimes at 10pm after school.....because of that he was able to provide for my mother, brother and I very well, thank you. Sure if he decided not to go to school and played catch with us it would have been fun...he would not have been happy and because of that, we would not be happy. Being a parent does not mean your life dreams have to suddenly change. You will do them anyway...or resent not doing them and take it out on your wife and kids later in life.

BabyReagan wrote:

Hi!

Will cut to the chase. 24 year old, turning 25 later this year. Just found out my girlfriend is pregnant, and she is on the fence but leaning towards keeping it.

While I'm no world beater I'm a competitive runner in my area and improving steadily, I've set career goals of sub 14 and sub 29 that which I intend to pursue (Currently at 8.15 for 3000m and 14.15 for 5000m). Now, spare me the "you're not fit to be a father if you put your running career before the child's needs"-comments, I understand that priorities will change. What I wanna know is, preferably from somewhat competitive runners, is it possible to finagle a serious running career while having a young child? My girlfriend would (most likely) be supportive of my running as long as I still play my role as a father in the relationship.

Much obliged.

Agree with jewbacca here. These threads always tend to devolve into a false dichotomy where it is deemed that we have to choose between loving our families or serving ourselves by pursuing a passion. There is no reason why choosing to follow your passion for running has to mean you are ignoring your family or even simply not pulling your weight.While this is less applicable with newborns, ever since my kids were toddlers, they have enjoyed coming to road races to watch me run and then to join in the kids' races after. They see me and my wife going out for daily runs, and they talk about how they want to do that some day. They ask me how many miles I am going to run. I think I am modeling important behavior patterns for them.Honestly, it does cost me some time with them, but I do my best to minimize that time, and not everyone subscribes to the same theory of parenting. Among the components included in my theory of parenting is the idea that I am not supposed to be a part of my children's lives for every waking moment. They need independence, and freedom. And the impact can be minimized. I am not a churchgoer, so I take the time on Sunday to get my long run in while my family is at church. If my kids have a fall soccer game, I will ride there with them and watch the game, and then run home to get in some of my mileage (by the time they get home with traffic, I may only be gone for 20 minutes while they are at home while I get 6 miles in).This doesn't have to be an either/or moral question.

jewbacca wrote:

DAD not DONOR wrote:

Don't be selfish about your running, I know it's important to you, but your role in this child's life is much more important.

Careful how far you take that. You can have wonderful experiences by including your children in your hobbies. As with most things, balance is key.

Please pop the real one. wrote:

I'm not sure if the op ever returned.

At any rate, just wanted to point out that in addition to the responses above saying that you can be elite with children, I would point out there are some pro runners with children. Rupp, Mo both have kids.

There are some women pros with children too, but I can't think of who off the top of my head.

Kara Goucher did it, even if her career did derail some after the birth of her son.

I think that the pros are a different deal though, because they don't have quite the same balancing act to perfect. Running is there livelihood, instead of something that they are trying to fit in after working their main job. That is a little bit of a misleading statement in that the Kara Gouchers of the world spend significant time doing meet ups, working on their social media presence, dealing with sponsors, etc. But I still don't think it is quite the same as someone working in an office 40-50 hours a week and then trying to fit running in as well.

Thanks for detailed response. I don't reside in the U.S. but in Europe so parental leave would be ample the first year and a half, I'm still in school for my graduate studies which also lends itself fairly well to training. I appreciate the response, it's just so much to ponder over.