Did you know none of that beforehand? Did it not occur to you that the literally hours of travel and wait time before your wave started would take a toll on you, to say nothing of the difficult, hilly, technical course? Even your hotel room seems to have you deeply upset--did you expect a fridge in your room? Did you plan knowing that you wouldn't have one? Did you ask in advance if there would be a fridge in your room?
Yes, many people run NYC for the experience. It's the largest marathon in America. You get to run a marathon that goes through all 5 boroughs. You get to be cheered by fans in Manhattan. It's a marathon that a huge part of the public knows is happening and you can tell friends and family afterwards that you were there, you ran it. That's the experience--but so is the ferry ride, the bus, the wait, the wait, the wait, the realization that damn those bridges are up high and the ramps are steep. It's not heresy if you disliked it for the reasons you noted--those are largely statements of fact, not opinions. Everyone accepts them and if you want the "glory" of running NYCM you accept the crap that it takes to run it.
Other parts of your posts are a little inflexible, though, which is a position frankly unsuited to marathoning. All this expecting results, running with a purpose, training precisely is nice, but sometimes it's just not your day. You don't need to conduct an RCA to determine failure points, sometimes it just happens. Here, though, you've heard from many, many people saying you did well and should be happy with your effort. So go run that regional, flat and fast 2017 marathon and get your 2:55.
To me, a marathon is a marathon. I do not need the "experience." It is over-rated anyway, as the logistics were lacking. I train for a purpose, and I race for a purpose. I train hard and precisely, and I expect results. Until this point, I have gotten results (i.e. have always been faster in the race than in training).
It may sound like heresy, but my overall view of the NYCM is negative. .