Moving in With Significant Other

parking your trailer next to hers is not the same as moving in.

Story of My Life wrote:

Thinking of moving in with my significant other, and was wondering what others' experiences are here on the boards. We will have been together for only about 4 months by the time we would move in together, which I imagine is a bit on the fast side of things. Anyone have experience with moving in together so soon in a relationship? And any practical tips on things to settle before moving in (obviously we will talk finances, house work, etc.)? For added context, I am 27 and she is 23.

Serious and non-serious responses welcome.

honestly, if its something that can work out, then it will work out just as well 6 months from now. Not worth it at this point imo

Are you going to marry this girl?

If so, why wait?

If not, why move in together?

Has she ever lived on her own? Have you?

How about the obvious: not sure yet because 120 days of knowing someone is not enough.

Get ready for the Pre-Nuptial Shut Off

Go for it. You'll get in lots of banging and save a few bucks on rent.

If possible, don't bring anything your not willing to lose when either of you moves out

Had a break up go south quickly, girlfriend moved out, she kept her key so she could pick up her stuff at her convenience.

Came home from work early, to find everything but my clothes boxed up.

Shouting match ensued over who owned what. I owned basically everything since I had lived on my own before and she hadn't. I called the police, they interviewed us seperately, the cop I talked to said he believed my side of the story, but I better hope she doesn't say I hit her, because if she does, I'm spending the night in jail.

She didn't and I didn't. Still hate that crazy B.

Life is an adventure and sometimes you have to live it to see. I don't recommend living with an SO unless you are doubtless about it being the right move. If you are thinking in terms of pros/cons and you are putting financials in the "pros" then you are not thinking logically. But we all come from different cultures, different families, different backgrounds, and so does your SO. Good luck. Be respectful and make sure you have access to your own "space" and "time" because if you don't you may feel constricted and resentful.

I lived with someone I shouldn't have and second guessed my choice and it ended very badly for her (I was 21)... I lived with someone I shouldn't have and second guessed my choice and it ended poorly for me (I was 27), but I found it to be a great growth experience. After that I lived alone until I found my future wife, and I never had a doubt in my mind. We were engaged after 9 months and moved in together after another 3 months. Again, no doubts. We'll be married 10 years next month.

I started a similar thread years ago.

TLDR; took lrc advice and didn't move in. Ended up breaking up.

thejeff wrote:

Are you going to marry this girl?

If so, why wait?

If not, why move in together?

Because actually getting married has little or even nothing to do with any of this.

Plan an exit strategy.

Living together can be fun, but the odds are that it will not last.

Story of My Life wrote:

Thinking of moving in with my significant other, and was wondering what others' experiences are here on the boards. We will have been together for only about 4 months by the time we would move in together, which I imagine is a bit on the fast side of things. Anyone have experience with moving in together so soon in a relationship? And any practical tips on things to settle before moving in (obviously we will talk finances, house work, etc.)? For added context, I am 27 and she is 23.

Serious and non-serious responses welcome.

Have you talked about this? I would guess she doesn't want to move in with you

After 2 years in a committed relationship when I was 23, my girlfriend and I moved in together. Loved her to death and thought we were going to be together for a very long time.

Within 6 months or so we were at each others throats all the time. Bickering over the most trivial sh*t you can think of. I moved out very shortly after that and we broke up.

The poster who said you will know if it was the right decision after about 6 months is spot on. Either it works great, or you crash and burn!!!

I've not raised the issue with her, but there have been undertones in conversation (from both of us) about it; her lease is up in a few weeks, which is the context in which it has been alluded to. And I think certainly she would want to move in with me, she's already over about half the nights of the week.

I've been in a handful of what I would consider serious relationships, and definitely feel different about this person. Ideally I'd want to wait 6 months or so before talking about moving in, but, to another poster's point, when you know you know. There's also no financial pressure on my part (luckily) to split rent, so I'd like to think I'm not rushing it to save money.

That's Great! Thanks for posting!

Story of My Life wrote:

Thinking of moving in with my significant other, and was wondering what others' experiences are here on the boards. We will have been together for only about 4 months by the time we would move in together, which I imagine is a bit on the fast side of things. Anyone have experience with moving in together so soon in a relationship? And any practical tips on things to settle before moving in (obviously we will talk finances, house work, etc.)? For added context, I am 27 and she is 23.

Serious and non-serious responses welcome.

Seriously: you are putting the cart before the horse.

Why is this such a big deal? Just move in together, then when it doesn't work out you move somewhere else.

Also there are a lot of famous sitcoms in American television history that can provide you with insights into your cohabitation.

You're welcome.

Moving in with someone before you get married is a really good idea IMO. When I did it, it caused me to grow up and realize how challenging and rewarding it is to have someone involved most every decision you make. You cant be that close to somebody without a high degree of compatibility and willingness to deal with each other's issues. That becomes really obvious when you live together. My wife and I have been married for 20 years and haven't looked back. I don't think you should do it until you are pretty sure that she is the one and that this is the final step before you tie the knot.