How to broach the weight gain subject with wifey without starting war?

The bigger the cushion,

The sweeter the pushin'.

Hi Rob

Trick her.

Go for a walk every evening.

Hide the mayo.

If she dun wanna run, she dun wanna run!

"No medical issues."

Report back in twenty years when you have a 240 pounds overweight blob of fat lying on your sofa

have some self respect man. either make her work out or kick her out of the house quick.

Wars started by the hands of the oppressor are always unjust. Think of her weight gain as the anticipated outcome of years of devaluing servitude to the master. Lack of interest in one's health results from resignation.

Read Adtienne Rich's essays on the Sukrut of marriage for further insight,

Any chance, at all, that the weight gain is a symptom of something else? Depression maybe? What's the health of the marriage like? Are there kids being raised?

There is usually more going on.

Do thing that highlight how fat she is. Buy her a nice sweater, but buy XL because "it looked like it would fit you". When you are in bed together jiggle her fat and saw "wow, squishy". Pretend you can't both fit somewhere because she is so huge.

If all else fails watch "my 600 lb life" on tv with her and make snyde comments like "that guy should have left his wife once she started getting big like that." And "people who can't control their weight are soooool gross and unattractive"

it will make her think.

Can't you kind of spot this kind of before you get married? Like look for a woman who is somewhat tall and lean with muscle definition?

MeekHubby wrote:

Ok, spare me the jokes.

Wife's a nice person, but she's never been really fit or played sports and now and that she's getting older she's gaining like a pound a month each and every year. Classic pear shape. No medical issues.

I workout every day and watch diet, but she just doesn't care any more and it's an issue for me. I bought her a FitBit for Xmas and it's still in the box it came in.

Suggestions?

Is she depressed? Low thyroid? Sometimes it is a lot easier for women to pack on the pounds.

Also, your say "she doesn't care anymore." That is the problem. If she doesn't feel respected, valued, or invested in the relationship why should she care? Men often do not understand that women are turned on by romance and feeling appreciated. When there is a lack of sex going on, it is often because the man is not attending to the emotional needs of his wife, and men don't want to have sex when they feel treated poorly.

So, what are you doing for her lately? Maybe she has little interest in pleasing you because she doesn't feel valued.

Maybe do some things like: buy the groceries (but buy ALL healthy foods), cook meals for her (something healthy like a vegetable stirfry), make a nice fruit salad with her favorite fruits. Try to find some game or active hobby that you can do with her that she actually likes.

1. don't get married. who needs to get married nowadays? f marriage. if you want to be with someone be with them.

2. be with an athlete if you are an athlete

3. be an example of healthy living and don't be an a**hole about it

this is good advice!

Go to the gym with her. You then have both a fit wife and the opportunity to pick up a hobby jogger fitness girl or two on the side. Win win baby!

I'm trying to picture these same responses to a husband that's put on weight. Would you also lead with depression and low thyroid? Would you consider that the husband might be victimized by an inattentive and sexually low key wife? Would you wonder what the wife has done for the husband lately? Would you attribute the husband's weight gain to perception that his wife undervalues him? Would you suggest that wife should assume cooking responsibilities?

stranger than fiction wrote:

blah blah she's a victim blah blah.

Just say "my friend Bob left his wife because she got fat and I really don't blame him".

dont know details wrote:

Can't you kind of spot this kind of before you get married? Like look for a woman who is somewhat tall and lean with muscle definition?

Of course you can. That's why if you marry, you marry someone who takes care of themselves. Your lifestyles and mindset have to jive. OP blew it.

Talk about it in terms of health. Talk about how worried you are you'll lose her too early when you want to spend all your life with her. Talk about the activities she enjoys, and how you can do more of them together and how else you can support her. Talk about the adjustments you can make in her schedule so she has more time for physical exercise. Talk about the stresses in her life that you can help with.

Suggest a vacation to a beach resort a few months out, or one that would involve a lot of bathing suits. It might help if you go with other couples where the wives are on the slimmer side of things

colder and wiser wrote:

Talk about it in terms of health. Talk about how worried you are you'll lose her too early when you want to spend all your life with her. Talk about the activities she enjoys, and how you can do more of them together and how else you can support her. Talk about the adjustments you can make in her schedule so she has more time for physical exercise. Talk about the stresses in her life that you can help with.

Can work, just don't do the health thing. She will see through it instantly. Keep it honest. You hate her fat body, you tell her that you do. No bullshitting about health.