I am the real Mike Rossi wrote:
Thanks, buddy. My comeback may be on hold for a while - the CIA has asked me to do some top secret spy stuff. I'm willing to do it because America needs my help.
I'm Mike Rossi.
You're not the real Mike Rossi, I know because the FBI got to me first and I'm working for them. Tough lot though, they put me through a lie detector test and asked if I cheated the LVM before they would employ me. When they connected the diodes it sent the machine crazy, something to do with the chemicals in my skin from the fake tan and the leaching through the pores of other chemicals absorbed from my dyed orange hair. They gave up in the end and believed the statement from the LVM RD, so America, you can sleep peacefully in yours beds tonight.