Unhappy Thanksgiving - Uninvited Relatives, Strife, and Misery

Haha I love this idea!

Good bread,

good meat,

good God,

let's eat.

Tase anyone who steps out of line.

Turkey Runner wrote:

we can have a Muslim, a Hebrew, ours, and an agnostic point of view/blessing shared. Now we are being given the word that people will not attend or walk if that goes down, and apparently words have been exchanged between family members.

This is the whole problem right here. People put a big religious spin on an event that had absolutely nothing to do with religion. The Pilgrims invited the Wampanoag to dinner because Massasoit and Squanto had saved them from starvation. They didn't invite their god to dinner.

Here you are worrying about prayers and religion. Why not instead thank the Indians for inventing the corn and potatoes you are about to eat? For helping your ancestors when they should have driven them back across the ocean?

Bad Wigins wrote:

Why not instead thank the Indians for inventing the corn and potatoes you are about to eat?

Specifically, their food scientists.

Just do a simple moment of silence

dude,

Tape this. Put it on youtube. It'll get 1,000,000 hits

Just two words of advice: Drink Heavily. And put your foot down against any bullsheet. If anyone gives you lip about grace, food, etc. just look them in the eye and say firmly and loudly, "This is my house and I am the host of this gathering." Take no crap.

Get up abruptly during dinner and announce to the guests that you're going to be sick. Run to the bathroom and proceed to wretch, cough, moan loudly behind the door. When your wife asks if you're okay, beg her bring you a bottle of pepto bismol.

Your guests will clear out real quick, I promise.

[quote]Observe and enjoy! wrote:

If you really want to enjoy the full on thanksgiving experience, start drinking as soon as you get home from your turkey trot and try not to care what anyone else thinks. /quote]

This.

It took me a long time to learn. Then one Xmas I went on a long group run on the 24th, and we all had screwdrivers after (the bar didn't have mimosas). I suddenly realized being pretty buzzed at the inlaws to start the day was awesome.

After that, every Thanksgiving and Christmas (yeah, we have to do both holidays there), I open the wine as soon as I get there, and pretty much keep it going.

As long as you're at the happy medium of alcohol intake, it makes it much easier to not react to your racist mother in law, etc.....

It's 2014 and I say Grace and will continue to do so even if I live to 2050. i hope everyone has a Great Thanksgiving and one of the posters here is correct if you are the host it's up to you to set the tone. You can be polite and not get your blood pressure up and if they do not like it they can leave. don't let other peoples bad behavior ruin your holiday. Each day is a gift and if someone wants to be miserable let them do it by themselves on thier own time and not ruin your day.

Why get together at all if it ends up like that? Just have a nice dinner with the immediate family and call it good. If your relatives only cause strife, cut them out of your life.

problem solved wrote:

Why get together at all if it ends up like that? Just have a nice dinner with the immediate family and call it good. If your relatives only cause strife, cut them out of your life.

Because they are FAMILY! My family is as f'ed up as the next but they still my blood. NEVER turn your back on family.

Appreciate the general commiseration.

Could still use some general advice about when/if to call cops on a family fistfight. I could call the police and ask but I doubt they are gonna give me much. And to be clear I am not asking for advice on how to prevent the fistfight, just when/if to call cops.

Never call the cops during a family brawl. Let your family work out the pecking order on their own terms. I took dominion over my family last Thanksgiving when I hurled a scorching hot turkey at my grandfather's head for talking shit about my girlfriend. I don't anticipate any trouble this holiday, now that everyone knows who's boss.

Dude - you are clearly missing the fine guidance that has been offered. You don't need to call the cops. The cops will put a damper on the much needed release of emotions that can only result from a mano y mano contest. Give 'em your best "gay" grace before dinner and don't forget to disparage Allah. If tempers flare, tell them to take it outside and settle it like men. If you plan it right, you can set up a UFC style bout at halftime of the Niners-Seahawks game, and sell tickets. Wear a Go Pro and put in on you tube. Bonus point if you get your wife to dress up in a ring girl outfit. C'mon, its a holiday. have some fun.

Kids table is a great idea.

if it gets to a point where you think it's getting out of hand calmly get up and say either calm down or you need to leave. You need to become the concise person where everyone knows what you say goes. No long speeches or yelling. Your word is your bond

Honestly, I've been here before. My family is nuts, racist, mean and I don't associate with them anymore. It's the calmness that works in a sea of loud people. Typically you'll say that and someone (or everyone) will be like "oh, stop blablabla" etc." Listen...This is key. Remain calm. Simply say," I will not repeat myself"

But then you need to be a man of your word. If it doesn't calm down immediately and continue for the whole night, you calmly kick them out or tell them you will call the cops immediately if they don't leave. If they don't immediately seriously, get up and call the cops. If they say ok we'll leave and actually leave, fine you can not call. But none of this "ok we'll calm down now" bs and then you let them stay. You made the conditions clear, they are leaving, now. If it comes to cops... You need to tell the cops is that you have hostile relatives in your home who will not leave.

Look it's going to be a bit awkward but you will respect yourself for it. This is your home (with your wife) you need to raise a family in a loving environment and sometimes it takes tough love and concrete rules. I dunno if you have kids but I wouldn't let them be surrounded by family strife.

Your family shouldn't get any special privilege to be jerks, don't tolerate it.

Legally, it is a good idea to ask for the police to come when you are calling for an ambulance.

YouAreDumbAsF*ck wrote:

what the f*ck?! this is 2014, who the hell still says grace AND WHO THE HELL CARES THE WAY IT IS DONE?

Ignorant. Go back to Europe.

Some of the most successful and nicest people are Christian. That is a FACT. Case in point - Rich Froning (multiple CrossFit Champion) frequently talks and posts (twitter etc.) about his passion for the lord.