Defender: Point of parliamentary procedure!
Semi-sane Marathon Maniac: Don't screw around, they're serious this time!
Defender: Take it easy, I've run 100s of virtual ultra marathons.
Semi-sane Marathon Maniac: I thought you actually ran them all.
Defender: What's the difference?
[Addressing the room]
Defender: Ladies and gentlemen, I'll be brief. The issue here is not whether we broke a few rules, cut the course, caught a ride in a vehicle, copied a bib number, make up our own times and races, or took a few liberties with our female party guests - we did.
[winks at Dean Rojo]
Defender: But you can't hold a whole marathon system responsible for the behavior of a few, sick twisted individuals. For if you do, then shouldn't we blame the whole athletic system? And if the whole athletic system is guilty, then isn't this an indictment of our educational institutions in general? I put it to you, Rojo - isn't this an indictment of our entire Iranian/American society? Well, you can do whatever you want to us, but we're not going to sit here and listen to you badmouth the Iranian United States of America. Gentlemen!
[Leads the Marathon Maniacs out of the hearing, all humming the Star-Spangled Banner]
Typical Letsrunner: We have an old saying in Letsrun: don't get mad, get even.