I'm in my mid-20s and I'm very slim. Does society view this in a negative way?

Charlie Freak wrote:

bigtool05 wrote:

6'4 and 175. I'd probably do a tiny bit better with girls if I was more muscular, but not enough to make we want to put on weight.

This is what absolutely amazes me about obsessed hobby distance runners. They are not an Olympian and don't run for a living, but they'd rather do without a** than gain 5 or 10 pounds of muscle and possibly lose a few seconds per mile. That is profoundly strange. Is it any wonder distance runners are seen as weird?

Can we talk about the fact that you consider getting laid to be the pinnacle of human achievement rather than something that is really fun, but ultimately meaningless and pretty hazardous nowadays....?

I don't get why you keep saying overweight and obese for someone who isn't a stick?

honestly guys that are 6'0 and 170-180 aren't big guys.

I'm not saying and certainly not advocating you become a monster to get girls. What I am saying is just look fit and healthy. 175 and 6'0 can be pretty damn lean.

And yes, of course you skinny guys that are 140-150 and 6'0 types can get attractive women but your chances definitely are worse, all other variables held constant, then a 175-185 guy who is decently ripped. I can totally understand elite runners or even national level guys (sub 4:10 mile range) as they are making a sacrifice in their appearance for their sport.

What I don't get is the hobby joggers (even the "fast" and cocky ones) Who the hell cares if you run 17:10 instead of 16:40 in your local fun run? Both times are super jobber!! I shake my head when I see some obsessed emaciated looking guy doing 100miles a week and afraid to lift weights and sacrifice 20 seconds so he can go under 16 instead of 16:25. And trust me I know a few!

Actually it was funny. I get decent looks and do fine by the ladies and one of my best friends is a pretty ripped guy about 6'1 and 200lbs. I am way fitter than him in all aspects (can bench more, run faster etc). A couple years ago I got obsessed with running a fast 5k ("fast" as in breaking 16:30 I am not much of a runner) And I went from 180 to about 155 by the end. Personality everything was the same but I hit a massive dry spell with woman and the comments whenever me and my buddy went out were reversed.

It used to be me always getting compliments on how athletic I looked (not big, or muscular but athletic) and him getting nothing. All of a sudden, even though I was fitter at 155 he was getting heaps more attention.

Food for thought for anyone slower than 15:00 in a 5k. faster than that you get a pass ;-)

DegenerateBonobo wrote:

Charlie Freak wrote:

This is what absolutely amazes me about obsessed hobby distance runners. They are not an Olympian and don't run for a living, but they'd rather do without a** than gain 5 or 10 pounds of muscle and possibly lose a few seconds per mile. That is profoundly strange. Is it any wonder distance runners are seen as weird?

Can we talk about the fact that you consider getting laid to be the pinnacle of human achievement rather than something that is really fun, but ultimately meaningless and pretty hazardous nowadays....?

I'd be glad to talk about that if that was actually what I said. But as a supreme bullsh*tter trying to make a point, you already knew that didn't you?

Most normal men under the age of say, 65, consider sex an important part of life. Not the most important part of life, but enough so that porn, strip clubs and prostitution are multi-million dollar industries (full disclosure: I've never been inside a strip club or used a prostitute). I don't apologize for liking sex or for trying to make my body attractive to women so I can get more of it.

8/10

Charlie Freak wrote:

DegenerateBonobo wrote:

Can we talk about the fact that you consider getting laid to be the pinnacle of human achievement rather than something that is really fun, but ultimately meaningless and pretty hazardous nowadays....?

I'd be glad to talk about that if that was actually what I said. But as a supreme bullsh*tter trying to make a point, you already knew that didn't you?

Most normal men under the age of say, 65, consider sex an important part of life. Not the most important part of life, but enough so that porn, strip clubs and prostitution are multi-million dollar industries (full disclosure: I've never been inside a strip club or used a prostitute). I don't apologize for liking sex or for trying to make my body attractive to women so I can get more of it.

Our shared misanthropy would indicate you are grasping at straws

Wow, do we have to have this same fucking thread every other week?

REDSAX wrote:

Welcome to America. obesity? Accepted. Slim and fit. Not accepted.

Go to Europe. I'm 5'10" 156 lbs. Skinny, not thin. I blended right in. Not here, but there.

No joke, its so annoying. If you are even remotely fit people will laugh and stare at you, call you a starving jew in the holocaust and tell you to go eat a hamburger. Whats also annoying is that when I try to explain to someone that I need to get from 150 down to 145 because its better racing weight the common response is "If you lose anymore weight you will die" But if a football player said, I need to put on a little weight and get stronger people totally agree with that... Or they just agree with getting fat. This country is bull shlt

the real truth wrote:

generally girls aren't looking to wrap there arms around a tiny runner. And they certainly don't want a dude skinnier than them.

The exception is other runner girls as they understand your prowess (if you are any good and not hobby jogger) and far and away all my runner guy friends are dating runner girls. A couple are decent players and get girls but they are a lot more ripped and supplement a lot with gym/ running isn't the be all and end all for them.

Some might take your statement "[a] couple are decent players" to mean "a couple are decent indecent players." What once was vice is now seen by many as virtue, and vice versa.

When I was a college runner i was 6 foot 3 150 lbs soaking wet. After college I started a new job with a pretty intense culture (youngest guy lowest on the totem pole) and I started working out and eating furiously to get bigger so the older guys would stop giving me crap. I am still pretty skinny at 175 but I do feel a lot more confident. I think it is important to have a big (not fat but not 150 like I was before) presence in the office. Ironically I had a really attractive gf when I was 150 and I am single now at 175. Would be nice to get closer to 200 but my body is terrible for putting on weight. I do notice people tell me I have nicer shoulders and traps, and it nice to actually fill out a suit for a change.

as sad as this is weight matters to women. I didn't run the last year and went from 120 to 145 ibs at 5'9''. At 120 pounds i was hitting mostly 6s and 7s and the occasional 8 with low self esteem. I went home over the summer and was getting 9s and 10s everytime i went to the bars. I am back running and weigh mid 120s and again i am not doing much better than 8s. I would gain weight but i am super obssesive about the small details in running like weight

A confident, interesting, funny guy will almost always do fine with women, no matter what his weight.

I think there a lot of young and inexperienced dudes posting on here.

The answer to the OP's original question is "no." Society doesn't really care about a man's weight. It's one of the principle advantages of being a man in modern society. Women...not so lucky.

Great topic. The reason it comes up frequently is because it matters.

I have lived both sides of the question, so I will share my experience. I was a 6-2, 159 lbs. HS and D1 stud. But my studliness stopped hard at the track. Girls were not digging it. 159 is very, very thin for my genetics, and does not look good at all. It was required for racing, but I had to diet to get there. Even at 80mpw, my body wanted to weigh more, but lighter was faster for me. (note, I am a 800-1500m man, not a 10ker) I had very, very little success with ladies in undergrad.

After D1 career was over, my running went to 25mpw tops, and I hit the weights hard 3-4x/week. My natural genetics were rewarded--I was working "with" my body, instead of being artificially underweight. I didn't do any special eating or supplements-I ate whatever I wanted. I packed on lean muscle like a boss. Over 18 months, I ramped up to 185, and it was all golden, rock-hard muscle.

I'm not going to be falsely modest--I looked utterly amazing. I had a physique like an underwear model. My "default" physique is not huge and burly and thick, but it is also not runner skinny. My default is that 175-195 mentioned by others.

The change with women was staggering. Nothing changed in my personality, finances, etc. but suddenly I could do no wrong with the ladies, especially at the beach/pool with no shirt on. My mid-twenties were tons of fun, and the ladies could not get enough. I absolutely disagree that it doesn't matter, confidence, blah blah blah. No way. Looking like a greek god opened up access to attractive women in a way I could scarcely believe.

Now 12 years later, I'm married with 1.5 kids, work crazy hours, and rarely work out. My default is still 175-195, but now the composition is a lot more fat, and I'm not blowing anyone's mind when shirtless.

The flip side? Nothing in life feels quite like being razor thin and efficiently running, and having the ability to float at high speed effortlessly. I can completely understand why "non-elites" might enjoy being thin--the freedom of movement it provides is hard to describe. When I was in my underwear model prime, going for runs just wasn't the same--it was a grind, not a thing of effortless grace and beauty.

I agree with others that no one gives a sh*t about the difference between 15min 5k and 18min 5ks, but if you love being light and fast, do your thing.

But socially and romantically, 18min and ripped is much nicer.

I'm almost 6' 5" and have never weighed more than 124 pounds. I don't think women think any less of me, although I can't say that for sure since I have social phobia and sit around masturbating when the urge to "be with" someone strikes. My best 5K is a shade over 19 minutes, so I assume that most people who see me walking around assume I am some kind of athlete and reckon my leanness is attributable to being an athlete and not owing to some nastiness such as HIV or cholera or whatnot. I have often wondered if guys built like me are built like me in "every way," if you get my drift. What I mean here is that my penis is probably close to 9" long but can't be more than 3/4 of an inch in diameter -- it looks not unlike one of those clear plastic tubes filled with gumballs you can get for like $1.97 at Wal-Mart. This is perhaps not relevant, but I also have a haircut that makes me resemble Sideshow Bob Terwilliger from "The Simpsons." I'm also missing parts of two fingers on my left hand from this time I had an accident as a teenager when a good buddy of mine dared me to let off an M-80 inside my closed fist. That really sucked but I still graduated from a good prep school and continue to take Zoloft and whiskey in a game effort to overcome my social issues. Thanks for sharing and for listening to my story.

adonis is spot on in every way a man can be spot on. youngsters read his thread!

Also for those of you who say a smart, confident man is key we aren't arguing!!! simply saying, all else equal being fit rather than being stick thin is more attractive!!

SFbayRunner wrote:

A confident, interesting, funny guy will almost always do fine with women, no matter what his weight.

I think there a lot of young and inexperienced dudes posting on here.

The answer to the OP's original question is "no." Society doesn't really care about a man's weight. It's one of the principle advantages of being a man in modern society. Women...not so lucky.

Even 300 pounds?