You are not the opposite of me. I am market neutral--long stocks and the S&P, short commodities, excess funds in Pimco Total Return. Also, my situation is a bit more "intimate" than yours. Since I retired from high tech in April, 2000, I have effectively run my own hedge fund, and since my wife's family saw me pull out of the market in 1999-2000 while most people (including them) lost a lot in 2000-2002, I have been managing my wife's family's retirement accounts since the 2002 bottom: My wife, her brother and sister, and my biggest "client" is my inlaws! I cannot get up and walk away from a message board if I make a major mistake.
There are several accounts here (no LP or LLC fund) and everyone is a little different based on risk aversion, but right now, my typical account is up ~14% on stocks (that are listed on this thread), SP futures are down 2% (the stocks and S&P are a wash) and we are up about 8% from being short commodities and some of the profits from commodities that have been used to buy more stock (FB and UA).
This is not a game for me and I don't take major risks, and I don't try to out-think the market: Take what the defense gives you. We have been hedged since July and will be through this month.