Did You Look Forward to Your Wedding?

was married last june and I agree the wedding is the most stressful part of the event. All we wanted to do was get it over with so we could enjoy the honeymoon. The wedding seemed to be for everyone else instead of us. My suggestion for you 2nd marriage would be run off to vegas or the carribean and have a small ceremony and enjoy yourself.

I was very nervous. We planned it all, and when the time came, I was surprised by my future mother in-law the day of the wedding, came to me and offered to give me a bj to calm me down. Life has been fine ever since.

NewEnglandRunningman wrote:

I was surprised by my future mother in-law the day of the wedding, came to me and offered to give me a bj to calm me down.

Well...

My wife is standing right over me so I will say, yes, I looked forward to it.

We started to stress out, but then did something I always dreamed of doing; we eloped. We saved a ton of money, got married on the beach at sunset and honeymooned in the same place. I highly recommend this. Of course, we didn't get many gifts and a few people were pissed, but for the most part everyone rolled with it.

I stressed about it big time, and I regret that I stressed. I look back and wish I could go back and just enjoy it. It could have been a blast, but I was too bust worrying about stuff. Just relax. Its your day to enjoy.

NewEnglandRunningman wrote:

I was very nervous. We planned it all, and when the time came, I was surprised by my future mother in-law the day of the wedding, came to me and offered to give me a bj to calm me down. Life has been fine ever since.

That seems a bit drastic.

Yep. Looked forward to it (was literally counting the days).

We had plenty of lead time to plan it; did the whole thing (ceremony, reception, dinner) in one place; and her mom paid. What's not to like?

maybe I'm sexist but I wouldn't have minded a small inexpensive ceremony. But it's the wife's day and I let her and her family do whatever they wanted. No doubt the most stressful day in our lives but looking back years later a great day.

The main reason I never got married, and I am not kidding, is because I didn't ever want to go to my own wedding. The idea terrified and repulsed me. I was with a nearly perfect woman whom I loved dearly for six years, and fortunately, she agreed with me. Of course, then she changed and left me. Still ...

I made all the arrangements, and it was very simple (~40 people, all family), so it was very enjoyable.

If you are a control freak, its a great day because you have told everybody explicitly how you want it to go, and since you are paying them, you can yell at them when in need of catharsis.

I would not want to deal w/ several hundred people...unnecessary.....

Which one?

OK, the first one I just wanted to get married and get it over with. All the planning sent my fiance and her family into a total spazzed out frenzy. The whole "getting married" scenario seeming to overwhelm the idea of marriage. Major stress. To add to the situation my mother in law (who was actually a very nice person) worked at a very nice hotel so that's where we spent the wedding night. Unfortunately, both in-laws decided to drop in on us after we left the reception with champagne to toast our wedding. We weren't really ready for or expecting company. Talk about foreshadowing.

So about four years later my then significant other and I decided to get married. The next Thursday. We had some friends be the witnesses and were wed at the courthouse. We had a mighty fine dinner at the nicest place in town with our friends. He swears to this day that it was light out when he drove home at 11 pm. His wife (who ended up having to drive) has a slightly different story. Outside of going to a "reception" hastily organized at a conference room at work the next day completely hung over because we didn't plan to work, no stress at all.

In a few months we'll be married for 25 years.

Take your pick.

Picayune wrote:

I didn't ever want to go to my own wedding.

Strangely enough, the first wedding I ever went to was my own. (And my sister had gotten married two or three times before I did.)

Why did the idea repulse you? Just curious.

Picayune wrote:

The main reason I never got married, and I am not kidding, is because I didn't ever want to go to my own wedding. The idea terrified and repulsed me. I was with a nearly perfect woman whom I loved dearly for six years, and fortunately, she agreed with me. Of course, then she changed and left me. Still ...

Been goin' steady for almost a decade. Consider myself 100% committed for life. Reason never married? Relatives are completely nuts. A wedding would be a nightmare. And eloping would be worse because everyone would be pissed that we didn't have a wedding and resent us for eternity. I hate weddings. They suck. What a waste of time. They are just an opportunity for the average shmoe to spend a pile of money so they can imagine for a day that they are something special. Pathetic.

hand job bob wrote:

NewEnglandRunningman wrote:

I was very nervous. We planned it all, and when the time came, I was surprised by my future mother in-law the day of the wedding, came to me and offered to give me a bj to calm me down. Life has been fine ever since.

That seems a bit drastic.

________________

But cool...

i hoping to get married down the road, but what i thought of a stress reliever is to run a race either the day before or the morning of your wedding. mostly weddings take place at night time, so run off your nerves in a race and then enjoy your wedding later on.

i'm getting married soon, and yea i'm looking forward to it. the planning hasn't been a headache at all because we haven't had meddling family members trying to push us on every decision. we honored our parents' requests for invitees, but other than that, the two of us have made all the decisions easily. i think the hardest part was registerring for wine glasses - registerring for gifts is a pretty perverse practice imo, but my fiance was into it, so whatever.

i guess it helps that we're paying for the majority of it. a lot of times, when parents pay, they hang that over your head, and the wedding day becomes more their day than yours. it's nice to be free of that.

we have one goal for the wedding day: great party. let's get drunk, party our faces off at the reception, move the party to the hotel bar when the time is up, and have a kickass time.