basically, all of my running failures from this week have been circling in my head (dropping out of 2 workouts, bad long run, easy runs feeling like mod runs, etc.).
and I realized something... basically I feel like my worth as person is pretty much defined by how fast I can run and how in shape I am.. even defined by how many miles I can do per week...
I didn't always use to be like this. I know the answer is that I need to take some time off from running and be grateful for other things but I feel like my life is suddenly worse if I run a 4:4x mile vs. a 4:2x. I know maybe I'm not the only one.
I understand there are bumps in running but how can I feel like I can deserve to enjoy life even if I'm not in peak shape. I know this sounds ridiculous typing out but this is seriously what's going on inside my head.
I feel so shallow. my girlfriend had to practically relearn everything after her battle with cancer and here I am complaining about something that won't even matter in ten yrs time...