An Open Letter To Suzy Favor Hamilton

reverend wrote:

(And I think it goes without saying that you and all the other moralizers on this board would judge a man who slept around much, much less harshly.)

You're absolutely wrong. I got married at the age of 45 (I'm 54 now) and I haven't once been sexually intimate, or even flirted seriously, with a woman other than my wife. Any married man who went and did what SFH did--slept with lots of members of the opposite sex (or the same sex, for that matter), for cash--would draw my condemnation as well.

People who marry take vows of fidelity. I take this to mean that you consecrate your (sexual) body, in some sense, to the purposes of expressing your love for your mate. Makes no difference whether you're a man or a woman. Don't get married if you can't remain faithful.

I'm fine with married people creating unusual "open" marriages. Will Smith and Jada Pinkett apparently have such a marriage. Some gay men apparently allow for this sort of thing within marriage. Some straight couples are swingers. Fine! Reconstruct your vows, with the help of your spouse, so that they make sense to both of you.

But don't just trick like a wildcat, for cash, and then ask me to say, "Free spirit." Especially if you're making your living as an inspiration speaker for young people.

Actually, I'll modify what I've written above: If SHF is looking to expand her career as an inspirational speaker so that she can address crowds of young men and women (and not-so-young men and women) looking to break into the porn industry, then her wildcatting is a pretty shrewd career move.

"Sitting around feeling sorry for yourself while your ex-GF/BF is out partying? DON'T! Get even, not mad! Empower yourself AND rake in huge piles of cash!!"

Etc.

Sheesh.

Callin It wrote:

You self righteous-religious fanatics make me sick. Always quick to condem every one except yourselves. Please crawl back in your cave and save the lectures for your own ilk. Quite frankly, you're not fit for society.

Actually, I'm an atheist who believes that prostitution should generally be legal, and there's not even a tiny sliver of self-righteousness in what I said. In fact, although I do believe that a decision to commit a crime is typically freighted with moral considerations, regardless of the wisdom of the criminal law, I'm not even expressing a moral judgment about Suzy's conduct. I'm simply saying that Suzy screwed up badly. The original poster's juvenile observations about sexual attitudes do not justify his absurd conclusion that Suzy did nothing wrong, any more than a diatribe about the wrongheadedness of the "war on drugs" would justify a conclusion that a well-respected 44-year-old mother, revered in her community, did nothing wrong by deciding to become a drug mule or a dope dealer.

Perhaps, you should also address the same letter to Tiger Woods, Arnold Schwarzenegger, John Edwards, Al Gore,Leann Rimes etc. It's exciting; so just do it.

Long time married male here, much longer than mssr. contraire here, and have remained faithful as well. Not at all condoning what SFH did. She needs help. However, the moralizers here make me sick. F-them!

Here is the reality:

Most of the men who are condemning this women for living out her sexual fantasies would have eagerly paid her in order to live our their own.

Former Elite From Your Era wrote:

Dear Suzy,

(1) You've done nothing wrong.

(2) You were born into a society that sometimes places heavy and impossible expectations on people.

(3) You were also born into a society that places heavy and pressurizing stereotypes on females...

Dear Duck,

(1) You do not know this and are simply in no better position to judge than all those moronic moralizers are.

(2) "Society" does not place expectations on people. People place expectations on themselves.

(3) "Society" does not place stereotypes on anyone.

etc., etc.

Why don't you start by speaking for yourself, not for some mythical beast named "society". Then, move on to not judging SFH and not telling her what to do.

Here, let me re-write your letter for you:

Dear SFH,

I hope you are doing well. I hope that you can ignore all the morons out there who will be passing judgement on you and just live your life as you see fit. Finally, I wish you and your family all the best.

Cheers,

Me

--

Johnny , Ill bring you into the loop.

No "john" excuse the pun paying for high end hooker is in just for the $600. Agency service's like the one she was working for are not looking for slam , bam thank you mam "john's".

Here's the math , the $600per hour is split with her agency , she never does just an hour. Add on the expected tip , $300 plus ( she keeps all of this ) , wine or champagne ( sorry no mini bar for the hIgh end hookers ) , food , hotels used are not at the far end of the strip. Note their is an expectation of gifts , note Suzy's wish list on her site. If its a date booking , dinner is not at Denny's. Her type of escort service would put a "john" out about $2500 average. Long term customers far more.

Good or bad she now is a celebrity around the world far beyond her life as an athlete. High end lawyers see this as PR , visibility for them every time the camera is on or a quote is being made. They are lined up now trying to get her as a client.Word is Gloria Allred is at the top of the list.

Oh the help she needs that you mention is a part of the possible story line for book and business that she will build on helping women out of similar situations.

Face It! wrote:

Here is the reality:

Most of the men who are condemning this women for living out her sexual fantasies would have eagerly paid her in order to live our their own.

And here comes another one who is somehow magically qualified to speak for others. Here's a hint for you dude. Try speaking for yourself. You know absolutely nothing about "most of the men...".

You are very welcome for this advice. I hope that you grow up to the point of being able to consistently speak for yourself and for yourself only.

I really really hope this isn't true. So far what she's done is, for me, her business, and, at worst, kind of sad. If she ends up on the book circuit and in a high profile court case, that would be the true whoring

Hear, hear! Well said.

Check out Catherine Millet's book. She is a major art critic figure in Paris who liberated her sexuality. The Sexual Life of Catherine O.

Or check out Catherine Deneuve's film "Belle du Jour" directed by Luis Bunuel.

Yes, there is plenty of libertineness out there. It is not shameful. Our infantilized morality is.

THIS.

SFH is a deeply screwed up individual who seems to be unable to handle not being in the spotlight. Remember Sydney? She had to flop down on the track the minute she knew that she wouldn't win.

That's why she's screwed up, not because she has a sexual appetite. She humiliated her husband and someday her daughter is going to be mortified by all this? For what? Some sense of adventure and being wanted? That's selfish as hell and speaks to extreme narcissism.

If she and her husband can work out swinging, then it's none of my business. But the fact that she was outed because she couldn't keep her mouth shut around her johns is pathetic. She needed attention so bad that she out her family in jeopardy.

feminist wrote:

Hear, hear! Well said.

Check out Catherine Millet's book. She is a major art critic figure in Paris who liberated her sexuality. The Sexual Life of Catherine O.

Or check out Catherine Deneuve's film "Belle du Jour" directed by Luis Bunuel.

Yes, there is plenty of libertineness out there. It is not shameful. Our infantilized morality is.

No, actually it was not well said at all as I explained above. It passes its own judgement (which may be more in line with yours but is really no more appropriate than those passing the 'whore' judgement). It is not this fellow's business to pass judgement at all. This fellow knows absolutely nothing about whether this was a healthy endeavor for SFH or part of an illness. This fellow does not speak for 'society' although in his self-righteousness he certainly attempts to. etc. etc.,

So, no, just because someone appears to be 'on your side' does not make what they are saying 'well said'. The letter was inappropriate on so many levels that the only way it could possibly sound OK is in contrast to the moralist nuts on here.

Try thinking more clearly.

This thread is making me sick to my stomach, starting with the OP's post. Is this really what our country is coming to that some of you feel the way the OP did. She did nothing wrong? Are you serious? She is a married woman with a child.

No, most of us that are condemning her would not then go out and pay $600 to be with her. That is called prostitution and it is both illegal and immoral if you follow moral ethics.

Also, for those saying people wouldn't have a problem with this if it was a man, I think Tiger Woods lost millions of fans once he was outed.

Do that many of you really feel like you would want to pay $600 to be with a married prostitute. You would feel good about that? Wow, just wow!!

Andreas wrote:

This thread is making me sick to my stomach, starting with the OP's post. Is this really what our country is coming to that some of you feel the way the OP did. She did nothing wrong? Are you serious? She is a married woman with a child.

No, most of us that are condemning her would not then go out and pay $600 to be with her. That is called prostitution and it is both illegal and immoral if you follow moral ethics.

Also, for those saying people wouldn't have a problem with this if it was a man, I think Tiger Woods lost millions of fans once he was outed.

Do that many of you really feel like you would want to pay $600 to be with a married prostitute. You would feel good about that? Wow, just wow!!

And yet another who does not seem able to speak only for him/herself.

How do you know what most "of us" would or would not do?

Andreas wrote:

This thread is making me sick to my stomach, starting with the OP's post. Is this really what our country is coming to that some of you feel the way the OP did. She did nothing wrong? Are you serious? She is a married woman with a child.

No, most of us that are condemning her would not then go out and pay $600 to be with her. That is called prostitution and it is both illegal and immoral if you follow moral ethics.

Also, for those saying people wouldn't have a problem with this if it was a man, I think Tiger Woods lost millions of fans once he was outed.

Do that many of you really feel like you would want to pay $600 to be with a married prostitute. You would feel good about that? Wow, just wow!!

"Moral ethics"?!? Wow, just wow!!

feminist wrote:

Hear, hear! Well said.

Check out Catherine Millet's book. She is a major art critic figure in Paris who liberated her sexuality. The Sexual Life of Catherine O.

Or check out Catherine Deneuve's film "Belle du Jour" directed by Luis Bunuel.

Yes, there is plenty of libertineness out there. It is not shameful. Our infantilized morality is.

Thanks, she should feel free to celebrate her sexual freedom.

As for the legality or illegality of hooking in our society...that debate is so stale. It should be legal, she'll deal with whatever fall out she needs to deal with.

Falling down in Sydney? An example of growing up in a society that puts too much pressure on Olympic athletes. USA citizens basically have no idea what it takes to get there and what the long odds are of winning in the Games. Add that to all the "Up Close and Personal" NBC media bs and the idea of winning for her dead brother. What a stew of pressure. One can see why Jenny Simpson did her thing in NCAA's.

Some of you need to get over the idea that you don't get to decide whether SFH is crazy or not -- the fact that we live in that kind of judgmental society...is part of the problem for these women.

What most men don't understand, is that most women think men are stronger, smarter, and better experts in things than women...subconsciously. So they often give away their power, defer to male "expertise" around them, and expect men to be the stronger of the two in Everything. It is a toxic mix that can lead some women to want to break out and do their own thing.

It takes many forms.

I wonder what influenced, her, what gave her the idea to take that route. Was it that series on HBO/Showtime about "Belle" the call girl?

And now the king of speaking for others ^

Former Elite From Your Era = feminist = countless other "posters" in this thread.

OP, you lose all credibility by replying to yourself ("Hear, hear!" - "Thanks"). Oh wait, you had no credibility to start with.