Also, "Yo Yo Ma."
Also, "Yo Yo Ma."
The one where Jerry doesn't eat meat and his girlfriend serves mutton and he spits it out in his napkin.
Or where he can't remember the girls name. I think it was Delores, he remembered that it rhymed with a part of a woman's body.
But, I choose the contest- the first time seeing it was amazing. When it came on in the first rerun it was called the funniest 22 minutes in TV history.
But again, "Not that there's anything wrong with it" was also a classic.
Great show.
Merv Griffen Show:
""KRAMER: Well, we've officially bottomed out. Who's our next guest?
NEWMAN: We've got no one!
KRAMER: We need a new format. We should shut down and re-tool.
NEWMAN: What about a guest-host?
KRAMER: I'll pretend I didn't hear that.""
""FRANK: "You step on it and it flushes."
ELAINE: "Why is your father giving a tour of a rest stop?"
ESTELLE: "Stop squirming."
GEORGE: "Oh, don't look. This is the part where they change me."
JERRY: "You're like eight years old."
ESTELLE: "Georgie."
GEORGE: "I was seven and a half.""
""I tell ya, it was a grind trying to fill 10 hours a week. I'm not sure I was ready to have my own talk show set."
""KRAMER: Oh, Elaine Benes. Well, this is quite a thrill, yes. Come on sit down. Yes.
ELAINE: Well, I'll tell ya, this sidler guy is really chapping my hide.
KRAMER: Excuse me yeah. We're talking ... this way.
ELAINE: Well, he's getting credit for work I did! He's gonna sidle me right out of a job.
KRAMER: Now, for those of us who don't know, uh, sidling is what?
ELAINE: Kramer, what is wrong with you?
KRAMER: What do you mean?
ELAINE: Well, for starters, you're looking at note cards""
"" KRAMER: Oh! Well, ladies and gentlemen! It's our good friend, George Costanza! What a surprise!
Yeah, sit, sit, sit.. Weeell!
GEORGE: Well, it happened again.
JERRY: What happened?
KRAMER: tut tut , I'll ask the questions. What happened?
GEORGE: Well, I just stomped some pigeons in the park. They - they didn't move.
KRAMER: All right, let's change the subject. Now, uh you and Jerry dated for a while. Tell us ... what was that like? That was the wrong card.
GEORGE: I I don't get these birds! They're breaking the deal. It's like the pigeons decided to ignore me!
JERRY: So they're like everyone else.
KRAMER: All right, let's take a short break. .... Okay! We're back!""
GREAT EPISODE
the cock fight episode.
"taaammmaaallleee........"
Just tell him you had sex with his wife.
Hey, how about, 'your cranium called, it's got room for rent'?
No, no! Jerk store's the line. Jerk store. JERK STORE.
The one in which George is taking the IQ test, and Jerry helps babu out.
And the frogger one. its a classic as george is running back and forth on the street.
The one where Kramer is trying doing something with a historic theatre and Jerry has to pretend he wears glasses. Elaine's button pops off her shirt and Lloyd Braun thinks she is coming onto him. I can't remember what else happens in this episode. I think it's the same one where George eats the Eclaire out of the trash and then at the end gets caught walking down the street dressed up in the medieval costume for the theatre and the mother of his girlfriend thinks he's crazy.
The one where George is trying to fish the marble rye out of the window. I believe this is the same one where Kramer feeds the horse Beefarino. Seinfeld steals the marble rye from an old lady and says something like, "let go of it you old bag."
When the series was coming to an end, we went over every episode and I remember there being one that had 3 hilarious, separate story lines that all came together in some fantastical way at the finish. It was in my mind, the best episode. Sadly, that was many years ago and I can't even remember the damn episode now.
Damn, they are all pretty funny.
Elaine to Jerry: "You know, it's so sad that all your culture comes from bugs bunny cartoons."
Jerry: "That is one angry clown!"
Jerry: "Kramer, who'd you sell your ticket to?"
Kramer: "Some nut in a clown suit!"
Also...
George: "You don't think she yada-yada-yada'd sex do you?"
Elaine: "I have."
George: "But you yada yada yada'd the best part!"
Elaine: "No, I mentioned the lobster bisque."
NO SOUP FOR YOU!
Elaine: "Next!"
Peterman: "George, give your ATM code, man!"
George: Bosco.
Elaine: Did you know that originally Tolstoy entitled his novel, "War what is it good for?"
Seinfeld, party of four!
The marble rye episode where George throws out the fishing pole line with the small hook to hoist up the rye
Jerry: No, it's too small, it's like for a muffin.
*****
The Alex Theater episode where Jerry is wearing those Harry Carey glasses because Kramer doesn't want to hurt Lloyd Braun's feelings, and that woman suspects George is crazy. Jerry drives by but can't see George because of the glasses.
George: Hey there's my best friend, Jerry.
Lady gives strange look to George because Jerry seems to be ignoring George.
George: He doesn't recognize because he doesn't wear glasses.
Lady: Uh, that man was wearing glasses.
************
The sea was angry that day my friends -- all time best along with "I'm out."
*************
Serenity Now!
"Serenity now, insanity later."
Like the one where Kramer was mistaken for a pimp also.
1) Eating the eclair out of the trash can
2)"It wasn't a pick. What, if I pick, do I not bleed?"
3)Festivus. First feats of strength, then we'll air out our differences.
4) Kramer does everything in his shower.
the one where they think their stock broker has spent all of their investments on cocaine, because he is always sniffing around them (due to a angora sweater); the bar scene with Kramer and the broker and the scene where he kicks open his bathroom stall to take a picture had me doubling over in laughter.
I always liked the one where George pretends to be a marine biologist. His story at the end of that episode kills me.
Kramer "Is that a Titliest?"
George nods
Kramer "Hole in one!"
festivus, marine biologist, hamptons, "you made all the stops!" tour bus, joseph and the technicolor dreamcoat, "step off, george!" soup nazi ...
I can help it but the one that Kramer is mistaken as a retard and get to sit at head table with Mel T
Coincidentally, today I talked to Bob Cobb aka The Maestro. (He lives in my area). That character was damned funny. But that got me thinking about anything with J Peterman - a classic character.
George is getting upset!!! Don't touch Jimmy!!
The Keith Hernandez double episode that makes fun of JFK is one of my favorites. The second spitter theory from Kramer and Newman.
"That is one magic lougie"
Also I really like the episode that is entirely in the parking garage. Jerry and george get cited for public urination.
stipe wrote:
Coincidentally, today I talked to Bob Cobb aka The Maestro. (He lives in my area). That character was damned funny. But that got me thinking about anything with J Peterman - a classic character.
Did you ask him if there's any places left in Tuscany?