Just once.
Just once.
My mother used to threaten us with my Dad spanking us. My Dad did the spanking but he never was angry - it was a distasteful chore to him. I got spanked maybe two or three times when I was a kid but I will tell you this ... I quaked in my boots at the thought of offending my Dad. He was, and is, a very gentle, wise man and I never wanted to offend him. That's why my Mom threatening to tell him the crazy stuff I might be doing was almost always enough to keep me in line.
Bear of Bad News wrote:
The Judge wrote:If you wouldn't sign up for this (and you wouldn't, regardless of what lame nonsense you want to claim here) then you should have the integrity to admit that spanking a child is not only just as bad, it is worse.
By this logic, no punishment is ever appropriate. If we're going to say that a punishment is wrong if we would not willingly "sign up for" it, then every punishment is wrong. No one would "sign up" for any punishment. That's what makes it a punishment.
I wouldn't sign up to go in time out. I wouldn't sign up to be scolded. I wouldn't sign up to be spoken to harshly or to be sent to the principal's office or to be given a speeding ticket. Are all of these methods of discipline improper?
I'm not necessarily saying that I agree with spanking. There are reasonable arguments against it. However, your argument is not one of the reasonable arguments.
Ummmm...what are you stupid or something? One does not sign up for punishment. One signs up for a system of which said punishment is part.
Damned you are stupid!
different nickname wrote:
My dad hit me from my earliest memory. He would hit me with his fists and knock me down all through the time that I was little and growing up. The last time was a big brawl when I was in high school and half his size where he knocked me down twice with his fists and I jumped back up screaming at him because I'd had enough of it. I should have just shut up and run away but I was totally pissed at him. He sat on me and beat me then bashed my head against the bathtub and broke my jaw, than my parents had me committed to a hospital because they lied and said I was crazy trying to cover up what he'd done. It was a week later they finally had my jaw checked and it was wired shut for 6 weeks. I left home and didn't speak a word to my parents for 20 years. My dad passed a few years ago.
No child should be hit or spanked for any reason at all. All it does is teach them that violence is the best way to live, but I vowed when I was little that I would not be like my dad or my parents. Don't ever hit a child. If I ever see anyone hitting a child it makes me furious, and I feel all that hate that I felt for my dad.
I'm sorry you were abuse but you have extracted your experience into some world lesson that it just doesn't merit. Not every child who is hit is abused.
I was hit 3 or 4 times growing up. Each time it was a single slap across the face. Unlike your parents, they weren't trying to injure me. They were trying to get my attention when words were no longer working. Looking back, I sure as hell deserved it. Yet, I didn't run away from home, I didn't get any bones broken, I still love both of them. It did not teach me that violence is the best way to live.
I wonder how different the responses to this question would be if they were posted on a football discussion board rather than a faggy running web site.
wilmarudolph wrote:
I wonder how different the responses to this question would be if they were posted on a football discussion board rather than a faggy running web site.
One difference would be that the posts on the football discussion board wouldn't be nearly so coherent.
I cant begin to fathom how retarded you must be to actually think you're right about your analogy. You are either a decent troll or mentally retarded. If someone acted now like they did when receiving a spanking when they were 5 not only would they get spanked they would get the shit kicked out of them. It should be used as a last resort you retard. Some examples hitting your sister...screaming and throwing things in a store...kicking a car..can I stop or are you still not getting this? J.F.C.
Corporal Smith wrote:
I got an occasional spanking from my parents. I even got a spanking at school in the first grade. It changed my behavior that's for sure.
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There are arguments for both sides. I showed the above quote because it makes a good point. I was also spanked in school, and it hurt. However, it did not make me a better person. It ingrained that hitting was a way to deal with a difficult person. That's only partially true, but not an equal part. Hitting only creates one thing: an atmosphere of alpha, and a person who will do their best to not get hit again, but no neccessarily stop being bad, just do a better job of not getting caught.
Also, the hitters are the people who have not really progressed much from their teacher and parents before them. We are expected to do better than the generation before us.
I whacked my kids when they made me mad, but I always felt bad afterwards. I noticed that this actually created an atmosphere of comfort around their mother rather than me. In time, they understood, and we kind of laugh about it. but, I wonder if I could have done a better job at being a father?
They are good kids- one research scientist and one doctor. But, I still wonder why I was not able to stop and count to ten.
I know hitting really didn't teach me anything except how to be trickier and faster at runnign away when an authority figure came to settle any problem.
that's not good.
My father was pretty free with his hands. I can only really remember one instance directed at me. He was asleep on living room floor (worked rotating shifts as a policeman, often sleeping during day when home) and my litte sister and I were sitting on the floor next to him, playing a board game. Maybe we started bickering, or just talking louder, but whatever it was woke him up. In his moment of irritation, from prone position, he hit me hard across the face. We must have been little kids to be sitting next to him like that; I might have been ten at the time.
The other instances I can remember from childhood were all directed at my siblings (I was, generally speaking, the "good" boy). I did, in my estimation, catch some of the "go around" as my older brother would take out on me what he got from my father. (And that's one of things those who support physical punishment as discipline should consider: it doesn't necessarily stop with the "deserving" recipient.)
I've not had kids but I have had dogs and, on occasion, have allowed my frustration to express in a physical way against some(thing) that I know won't fight back. When I do, I think of my father and I am not proud of myself.
My mom just back handed me (true story)
Mom was the disciplinarian....It usually took just one open hand smack on my upper thigh or butt cheek to stop my bad behavior - it was not done with anger and was done very infrequently, but my mother was strong - the red imprint of her hand on my thigh was a great reminder not to disobey.
Pete wrote:
BTW - there is a significant difference between administering a spanking, without evident anger, and hitting in anger in the heat of the moment. Slapping a child, punching, or otherwise adminstering some form of beating is completely different than applying a few firm blows to the butt.
I realize it's not particularly politically correct these days to believe in spanking. The older I get, the less I ascribe to political correctness.
I'm with ya, Pete.
Bruce Johnson wrote:
How about we meet and I give you a few firm blows to your butt.
Letsrun really isn't the place to come looking for a relationship.
I was spanked a handful of times as a kid. I deserved it. No biggie. I spanked my two kids a couple of times. They deserved it. Each kid is different.
As a college professor I can assure you that more kids should have been spanked as kids. I have no qualms saying that at all. Far too many spoiled brats with a sense of entitlement and lack of responsibility handed to them by parents who were afraid of being disliked. End of story. End of thread.
The problem with spanking and especially more serious beating is that it doesn't teach the kid that what they're doing is wrong, just that they'll be punished if they're caught. I remember as a kid I'd get in trouble a lot because of my temper (gee, wonder where that came from) and then do everything possible to hide it from my parents. Did my dad hitting me because I hit some other kid teach me not to hit other kids? No.
Kind of funny story I just remembered: my dad coming home from work late at night and hobbling up the stairs on his crutches (broken leg) heard me and my brother laughing and came in and started to hit us pretty hard with his crutch. He thought we were laughing at him, I guess. Pretty weird, he didn't even explain it at the time. I hope he felt bad about that.
I would be interested in knowing the ages of the people commenting. I was born in '69. I was spanked, and I don't think I knew anybody who wasn't. I was never abused or beaten--never hit anywhere except on the butt, with an open hand or a belt. My dad was sent to pick out his own switch a generation earlier. I did spank my own sons, far more sparingly (and open hand only), when they were very young and for major correction involving blatant defiance or disrespect to their mother. I never raised a hand to my daughter, who is younger. I do think there is a generational element to this discussion.
Yes my mother spanked me maybe 3-4 times in my childhood and each instance occured in the ages of 8-11 yrs old. I think it really kept me in line and taught me to have a respect for my parents. The only other instance of a physical punishment was when I was 14yrs old and flicked my dad off for no reason whatsoever other than he was getting on my nerves and we just got in an argument over something stupid (most likely my fault, blame it on the hormones). Anyway, he knocked me backwards and I fell hard on my ass. One of the most embarassing moments of my life. I felt humiliated and terrible for dissapointing my father. Never did it again, flicked anyone else off, or cursed in a social situation ever again.
Johnny Red Cheeks wrote:
I was spanked a handful of times as a kid. I deserved it. No biggie. I spanked my two kids a couple of times. They deserved it. Each kid is different.
As a college professor I can assure you that more kids should have been spanked as kids. I have no qualms saying that at all. Far too many spoiled brats with a sense of entitlement and lack of responsibility handed to them by parents who were afraid of being disliked. End of story. End of thread.
OK, so you have proven that college professors can be really, really dumb. But we already knew that.
What the heck wrote:
Johnny Red Cheeks wrote:I was spanked a handful of times as a kid. I deserved it. No biggie. I spanked my two kids a couple of times. They deserved it. Each kid is different.
As a college professor I can assure you that more kids should have been spanked as kids. I have no qualms saying that at all. Far too many spoiled brats with a sense of entitlement and lack of responsibility handed to them by parents who were afraid of being disliked. End of story. End of thread.
OK, so you have proven that college professors can be really, really dumb. But we already knew that.
And we have one more who would have benefited by having his ass tanned.