$$ Wedding Ring $$

Have you been drinking?

Feminism, thankfully, helped us jettison dumb traditions based on reasserting women's financial dependency. IN a post-feminist world, once women get equality in the labor market, why would we preserve this stupid bride-price tradition?

How is this for lame:

My wife and I don't even make 100k together (and made much less than that until recently:

We have:

1)No debt except a 15 year fixed with absurdly low monthly payments (cheaper than rent).

2)Managed to both pay off our student loans, hers substantial

3)Our 50k down on our house which only carries a 15 year fixed at 4.6%

4)3 year's salary in the bank.

Can you imagine how nice it is to have saved enough cash to buy a new car outright? To put 50k down on a house without sweating it? Way more happiness inducing than owning a ring. How did we do it? Lived like church mice for 10 years and saved, saved, saved, not giving in to status envy. Once you have a huge next egg, you can buy stuff without interest and can relax a great deal and still save money.

Market society wants you to think that rebelling against our culture of consumption that leads to no happiness (but more covetousness) is "cheap". It pays the man's bills. Misery loves company, I guess.

My wife just bought a racing bike with cash. She has paid off her loans, thanks to our good finances. She likes her bike better than any ring. I I tried to buy her a 10k ring, she would ask for a Cervelo Trial bike instead.

I see people buying expensive rings, but then can barely put 10% down on their house. This makes no damn sense.

I'm in agreement with the way you live brother. With the 3-year's salary in the bank, I hope you're investing for retirement too.

Is your wife ironclm?

Daft tard wrote:

HAHA thank you I agree completely. I want to get her something nice obviously and I'd hope she would agree that starting off financially responsible is the way to go. I know if I got her a very modest ring she would mainly be happy about marrying me but there is probably a part of every girl that wants a big ring.

Her family has money but by no means are materialistic however all her friends come from the same and I'm sure would judge.

thanks!

If you're having the marriage conversation, the ring conversation seems obvious. Ask her what she likes. You don't necessarily have to shop together, but there is definitely not a part of every woman that wants a big ring and you won't know until you ask.

I wanted no part of any stone sticking off of my finger, and basically agreed with everything Brian has posted here.

Also, if her friends are real friends, their personal taste in rings won't matter.

Daft tard wrote:

HAHA thank you I agree completely. I want to get her something nice obviously and I'd hope she would agree that starting off financially responsible is the way to go. I know if I got her a very modest ring she would mainly be happy about marrying me but there is probably a part of every girl that wants a big ring.

Her family has money but by no means are materialistic however all her friends come from the same and I'm sure would judge.

thanks!

If you're having the marriage conversation, the ring conversation seems obvious. Ask her what she likes. You don't necessarily have to shop together, but there is definitely not a part of every woman that wants a big ring and you won't know until you ask.

I wanted no part of any stone sticking off of my finger, and basically agreed with everything Brian has posted here.

Also, if her friends are real friends, their personal taste in rings won't matter.

I have not read all of the posts but I disagree with the people that essentially write that you should get a bigger ring of crappy quality.

The advice I was given is to buy the highest quality (4Cs) 1 carat ring that you can afford. This is big enough not to be embarrassingly small and small enough not be cheesy/cumbersome.

Even though the naked eye can't tell the difference, it makes no sense to buy a low quality monstrosity that appraises at next to nothing (when you and your future wife get around to getting homeowner's or renter's insurance).

Belgian Waffle wrote:

Even though the naked eye can't tell the difference, it makes no sense to buy a low quality monstrosity that appraises at next to nothing (when you and your future wife get around to getting homeowner's or renter's insurance).

if the naked eye can't tell the difference, it makes perfect sense to buy a bigger diamond, if that's what she likes.

I'd give her a pearl necklace