Help becoming a manlier Drinker

Are you sure? I've never paid more than $35 for Pinch 15 year.

The manliest of all drinks is Scotch NEAT. I started drinking it in college and now I genuinely love it, but it's nice that it earns you instant cred from older colleagues and bartenders. An added bonus is that one shot looks pretty pitiful in a lowball glass, so most bartenders actually give you about 3-4 oz of the stuff. Be sure to tip well when they do this.

It's a little relevant, being that you seem stupid when you get it wrong.

Booze and words, two things I take seriously.

Scotch neat is the way to go, agreed. But enough of this Johnnie crap- that stuff is fine, but it ain't close to the best, not even Blue, of which I have a bottle at home. Go for the real stuff- Lagavulin, Ardbeg, Laphroig, or high end Compass Box.

Especially the older Laphroigs. I like the peat flavor, but the 10 can be a little overpowering. The older ones are a bit more mellow.

Fat Old Man wrote:

If you like pina coladas, and getting caught in the rain; if you're not into yoga, if you have half a brain; if you'd like making love at midnight in the dunes on the Cape...

Then you are a manly drinker.

Nope, sweet fruity drinks are for girls.

greenliner wrote:

Scotch neat is the way to go, agreed. But enough of this Johnnie crap- that stuff is fine, but it ain't close to the best, not even Blue, of which I have a bottle at home. Go for the real stuff- Lagavulin, Ardbeg, Laphroig, or high end Compass Box.

I agree that JW is not the way to go. Single malt is typically best. There might be some decent blends out there, but the popular ones (JW, Chivas, etc) aren't in the category of decent blends. I'm a Macallan fan myself. The 12 year is good and the 18 year is some of the greatest whisky on the planet. Neat is the only way to go with any scotch unless it's cask strength (if it's cask strength, a splash of water helps bring the flavor and aroma out).

a grown man wrote:

Jaegermeister ... manly ... JaegerBomb (Jaeger and Red Bull)

Does not compute.

Well, JaegerBombs aren't exactly manly. But it is a tasty drink, in my opinion, and I think it's at least a step in the right direction for a guy who drinks cosmos.

Runningart2004 wrote:

Guinness....just make sure it's ice freaking cold.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/ce/GuinnessBeer.jpg/180px-GuinnessBeer.jpg

While we're at it:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Irish_car_bomb

Also, if you fail at this attempt to become a "manlier drinker", then just switch to wine. Good luck finding a Reisling at a bar though. When you grow up and start drinking wine let me know.

Alan

No. Guinness should be served at cellar temperature, or slightly below room temperature.

Guinness is actually quite gross when it's cold- the taste is completely masked. I do agree with you about Irish car bombs, though- terrific shots.

Also, no matter what any beer snob tells you (and I am a beer snob when I buy my own beer for moderate consumption), you need to be able to finish a 12oz can of any standard light beer in about 10 seconds or less. That's just to be respectable. To really become a manlier drinker, be able to do at least a 20 second keg stand, be able to win at least 2 consecutive games of beer pong/beirut, be able to shotgun a beer in under 10 seconds, and practice doing power hours until you can use it as a pregame.

sugar & spice wrote:

Fat Old Man wrote:

If you like pina coladas, and getting caught in the rain; if you're not into yoga, if you have half a brain; if you'd like making love at midnight in the dunes on the Cape...

Then you are a manly drinker.

Nope, sweet fruity drinks are for girls.

Haha. Just pointing out that this joke went right over this guy's head.

You really think so? You're either drunk or incredibly stupid.

phillie phan wrote:

No. Guinness should be served at cellar temperature, or slightly below room temperature.

Ahh, thank you. I was going to correct him on this but you beat me to it.

cirrhosis, pancreatitus, epilepsy, polyneuropathy, alcoholic dimentia, heart disease, increase risk of cancer, and oh yes...sexual disfunction; that's right you manly men you...a limp dick is a common side affect. These are just some of them. Acting like an *sshole and smashing into things with their cars are some other common ones.

I don't know what it's like where you live, but I remember looking through singles ads several years ago and was struck by how many women included "no cigarettes, no drugs, no alcohol" in their ads. Think again if you believe that most women like drunks. You've been watching too many advertisements.

what manly men we have here wrote:

cirrhosis, pancreatitus, epilepsy, polyneuropathy, alcoholic dimentia, heart disease, increase risk of cancer, and oh yes...sexual disfunction; that's right you manly men you...a limp dick is a common side affect. These are just some of them. Acting like an *sshole and smashing into things with their cars are some other common ones.

I don't know what it's like where you live, but I remember looking through singles ads several years ago and was struck by how many women included "no cigarettes, no drugs, no alcohol" in their ads. Think again if you believe that most women like drunks. You've been watching too many advertisements.

Thanks for the sermon. You've completely changed my outlook on drinking. Ass. I've never had a limp dick from drinking heavily. But I am able to last longer when I've had a few drinks, because the nerve endings are a bit numb. So that's a good side effect.

what manly men we have here wrote:

cirrhosis, pancreatitus, epilepsy, polyneuropathy, alcoholic dimentia, heart disease, increase risk of cancer, and oh yes...sexual disfunction; that's right you manly men you...a limp dick is a common side affect. These are just some of them. Acting like an *sshole and smashing into things with their cars are some other common ones.

I don't know what it's like where you live, but I remember looking through singles ads several years ago and was struck by how many women included "no cigarettes, no drugs, no alcohol" in their ads. Think again if you believe that most women like drunks. You've been watching too many advertisements.

You sound like a really fun person to hang around with.

what manly men we have here wrote:

cirrhosis, pancreatitus, epilepsy, polyneuropathy, alcoholic dimentia, heart disease, increase risk of cancer, and oh yes...sexual disfunction; that's right you manly men you...a limp dick is a common side affect. These are just some of them. Acting like an *sshole and smashing into things with their cars are some other common ones.

I don't know what it's like where you live, but I remember looking through singles ads several years ago and was struck by how many women included "no cigarettes, no drugs, no alcohol" in their ads. Think again if you believe that most women like drunks. You've been watching too many advertisements.

("dementia" and "dysfunction")

Who ever said anything about being a drunk? Single malt drinkers don't exactly have a reputation for being rowdy and destructive. Also, moderate drinkers live longer, have lower blood pressure, lower incidence of stroke and heart failure, reduced risk of Alzheimer's, Parkinson's, macular degeneration, and, yes, even impotence.

I'll admit that you make a good point about the Craigslist ads. I'm glad we've got a lonely, personal-ad-trolling, teetotaler to tell us what women like.

Go to a good restaurant such as Texarkana(though they have gotten rid of the pork with lime jello), look at the stupid little waiter trying to tell you the specials, point at him and in the most demanding voice that you can muster, say "J&B Straight AND a Corona!!"

Whether you like Guinness cold, warm, or room temperature is only about personal preference.

I've sat is the Guiness brewery in Dublin I’ve sat in the Gravity Bar at the Guinness Brewery in Dublin, Ireland with a freshly poured pint of Guinness and can say it was not ice cold or room temperature. I would describe it as somewhere in between.

Warm Tequila. The one with the sombrero on top it.

a bottle of jack wrote:

it was not ice cold or room temperature. I would describe it as somewhere in between.

Then they did it exactly right. Stouts and porters should be served at 50-55 degrees. When I pull a dark beer out of the fridge (35-38 degrees) I'm usually too impatient to let it warm up properly, but I definitely notice that the last few sips are more flavorful than the first few.