$$ Wedding Ring $$

1) I'm not opposed to spending money on jewelry. Too many people spend too much money on things that are worthless after a couple of years.

In other words, your grandkids can hock an expensive engagement ring if the sh__t ever seriously hits the fan. They won't be able to do that with your 60" flatscreen TV or your BMW.

2) Don't buy a diamond even if you are proud of their labor practices. The cartel has been going through convulsions and who knows what will happen over the next 10-15 years.

Not me (I think?) wrote:

So, my diamond is tiny. I am conscious of it and what that portrays. I, myself, don't give a hoot about diamonds. But, I often wonder what people think. Is this good? Is this bad? Am I not a woman worth spending money on? Am I so non-materialistic that I married someone that doesn't have to show love through a ring? Or did I marry a loser that afford a proper ring? Through the years he's mentioned that he'd also like to get me another one, but it doesn't seem like a good way to spend money at this point. Some days I don't feel like wearing it.

Dont be so conscious of what others think, or what you think they think. My current GF and I already know we are getting married, its just a matter of when I am ready for marriage (I am 23 she is 28).

Honestly if she knew I spent more than ~5-6k she would say no to me. She would sit there, look at the ring and say "not if you want to give me this huge rock, go get a cheaper one." She thinks its impractical to spend money on the ring, she would rather spend it on the honeymoon :)

I think everyone that is friends with us if they saw her with a huge rock would think, what an idiot this guy is, does he not know her and what she values? She values practicality, she drives a civic cause it gets from A to B, and makes fun of my volvo because I paid extra for comfort.

Basically who cares what anyone thinks. Those that mean something to you will know you and why you got the size and cost ring you did...

This entire thread is worthless w/out pics.

O.P. we can't tell you how much you should spend on a ring until we can see how pretty she is.

An engagement ring is a symbolic gesture that you are willing to significantly invest in her and you offspring. A diamond is generally without actual value, therefore making this truly a symbolic gesture, rather than something you benefit from, such as a down payment on a house.

I have heard you defense for being a cheap bastard a million times, but it's lame. Just shut up and participate in the tradition.

*your

*your

I think my "r" key is broken

0/10.

Brian wrote:

I wouldn't marry a woman who cared about a ring. Our society is in too much debt already for suttf that doesn't add to happiness. Use the money for a downpayment on a house. Antiquated wastefulness. Women work and have jobs now - why do they want our need a ring from me? In the long run, wouldn't htey rather have a husband who joins them in fiancial responsibility and doesn't start off with debt? If you have any debt besides a 15 year mortgage with a large down payment and choose to spend 3 months salary on a ring, you are starting down a bad road.

Peruse this blog and it will set you straight on women demanding rings:

http://roissy.wordpress.com/

Gawd, you are a sad man. I hope you are a character created for this site. Are you really that miserable?

ring ring wrote:

Basically who cares what anyone thinks.

that's cute of you to say, but the short answer is: everyone.

I cannot believe there are people who feel this way, but there must be based on the number of people that go into debt to purchase things that don't buy happiness. It is all about validation and self-worth issues. Sad. I didn't buy my wife a ring (and we eloped) and now on modest salaries we have a house with tons of equity, no debt, a pile of money in the bank, our student loans are paid, and we never have to worry about money or scrimp and save. Not enslaved to jobs we hate, not enslaved to "the man". A stupid ring becomes background noise after a few weeks.

Pay cash. Do not finance. You don't want to be making payments to Zales and to your divorce lawyer at the same time. Other than that spend away. Buy near Christmas or her birthday and add that money toward the ring too.

Daft tard wrote:

HAHA thank you I agree completely. I want to get her something nice obviously and I'd hope she would agree that starting off financially responsible is the way to go. I know if I got her a very modest ring she would mainly be happy about marrying me but there is probably a part of every girl that wants a big ring.

Her family has money but by no means are materialistic however all her friends come from the same and I'm sure would judge.

thanks!

Why would people let their friends judge them into debt? Material goods bought as signifiers are wasted. People want others to join them in their debt misery. Flagpole? Where are you at? We need some tough financial love over here!

This guy just asked this girl I work with to marry him and proposed with a pearl engagement ring. She said yes, but she's so embarassed to even show anyone the ring when they bring it up. I would at least get something she won't be embarassed to show people, but not so expensive when she cheats on you in 5 years you wish you weren't still paying for.

Was it a pearl ring or a pearl necklace?

I gave her nothing ... still married 25 yrs later and getting along good.

Just buy a nice ring you can be proud of.

Your economic situation will change though out your life.

The ring has long term value.

Please do yourself a favor and hyphenate your unit modifiers.

Remember the line from Jerry Maguire? After his fiancee punches him in the face, he has a black eye and and a cut and says: "Imagine if I had gotten her the ring she really wanted."

Keep that in mind.

4runner wrote:

1) I'm not opposed to spending money on jewelry. Too many people spend too much money on things that are worthless after a couple of years.

In other words, your grandkids can hock an expensive engagement ring if the sh__t ever seriously hits the fan. They won't be able to do that with your 60" flatscreen TV or your BMW.

2) Don't buy a diamond even if you are proud of their labor practices. The cartel has been going through convulsions and who knows what will happen over the next 10-15 years.

The BMW is probably a better investment:

A sad character? Why on earth would I spend 3 months salary on a ring? And why would any woman want such a thing. Has conspicuous consumption and pointless materialism progressed this far? You know what gift I gave my wife when we got married? Sound finances, lack of worry, help paying her student loan, and a life of debt freedom. Why establish debt before you even get married?

Women work now. They make as much money as we do. Feminism has changed the rules. You can't just change some and not others. My wife makes more than I do. This is a vestige of dowry or some other antiquated nonsense.

3 months salary for me would be 10k at least. Why on earth spend it on frivolty like a ring when you can almost buy a car outright with that?

What is sad is a woman whose happiness depends on something as stupid as a ring. Believe it or not, tons of women agree with this.

Keep your wife happy in the sack, make her comfortable with your dependability and shleering her throug the storms of her emotional swings and don't ever, ever start buying things to prove your love.

Isn't it better to have so much money in the bank that you can just quit your job worry free if you tire of putting up with it? That you have no debt enslaving you?