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Scott Anderson's Olympic Trials On-Line Journal:

A Dream Deferred or A Dream Denied?

Editor's Note:
This is the fourth installment of miler Scott Anderson's Olympic Trials Journal. If you missed his eye-opening
installments #1 or #2 or #3 we strongly urge you to read them before reading this installment as they provide background information which makes things a lot easier to understand (especially #1) . Click here to be taken to Installment #1.




Entry #4 - Posted Wednesday, July 6, 2000:
Saturday morning - July 1st - Portland Maine - Morning of Race - I wake up late after another fitful night of sleep, but I feel good. My legs feel fresh and my head is clear. I usually sleep pretty well in hotels, but this one has the most uncomfortable bed I've been in since my college-issue twin. Evidently, the management spends its funds on the lobby accoutrements, which include a ping pong table, a badminton net, a croquet course (which Honerkamp, Rhodes and I see as a good omen), and an extensive tropical bird collection. My roommate for the weekend, Terrance "The Arm" Armstrong, and I watch Deuce Bigelow on his computer as I eat frosted mini-wheats and grape nuts for breakfast (the one redeeming factor of the hotel room is its refrigerator). I reflect on how pathetic my life is that this is the second time this week I have watched this juvenile movie. To my credit, neither viewing was my idea. Actually, maybe that's even more pathetic. I realize I can't remember the last time I suggested watching a movie. Or suggested participating in any activity, for that matter. Am I just a follower?

After the movie, we migrate to the lobby for a noon-time meeting by the GAG (Reebok Enclave coach - Frank Gagliano). About 25 of us are seated on the ledge bordering the croquet course. We take bets on what kind of inspirational sound-bytes GAGS will produce. I predict that he will tell us to do six 150 meter strides on Monday. After 4 years in the Enclave, I know better than to expect a loquacious speech on what we've sacrificed and how ready we are. The GAG is short and to the point. He is famous for his ten second phone conversations: "Thursday, 4:30, six by 800, 2:10, byeclick." But his efficiency of speech earns our respect. Every phrase he utters drips with profundity.

So when he starts out his pre-race speech with "The vans need gas," we exchange glances searching for a deeper meaning. Is this a metaphor for how we should run our race? Apparently not. He wants Andre Williams (self-appointed driver and Olympic 5k hopeful) and Jim Hopkins (another Enclave coach) to fill up the vans with gas before we return to the airport tomorrow morning. Why the whole team needs that info is beyond me, but I find its inclusion in the motivational speech funny enough to relieve some tension. He proceeds to tell us not to think about Canada; all of the guys who need Olympic Trials qualifying times (which is about 90% of us) should focus on this race as if it's the season finale. We'll talk about Canada afterwards, he says. And then, oblivious to the irony, he gives us something even more mundane to focus on: he tells us to run easy Sunday, do six 150m strides on Monday (my accurate prediction earns me acknowledging glances from Honerkamp and Rhodes), and meet at 11:00 on Tuesday for practice.

In giving what is supposed to be a motivational speech, most people would be
afraid to dilute its potency by including trivial logistical details. But not GAGS. He treats us like adults; he knows that at this level, athletes are self-motivated. He can provide us with reminders of what we're here for, but he knows the fire comes from within. Once again, a reason we respect him.

I look at the heat sheets. The top 25 guys have been divided equally into the 2nd and 3rd heats of the 1500m. My heat, the 2nd, starts at 8:30 this evening and also includes Sammy G (3:40.7 this year), Terrance Herrington (3:40.3), Dan Wilson (3:39), Kip Ortenburger (3:40.5 last year), and The Arm (3:42). Rumors float around about Herrington (who already has his Olympic trials time) bringing a rabbit who will help him go for the A time of 3:36.8. That would mean 2:54 for the 1200m split. I know better than to count on it, though. Gags reassures Sammy and me that some of the Enclave 800m guys will come back to rabbit the second heat. Matt Holthaus (who already has the time) will keep the third heat honest.

Mike Ryan (3rd heat runner who also needs the time) comes down to visit. He has grand plans for his post-race celebration activities - Maine lobster and then a trip to NY to visit his girlfriend, Ms. Tennessee. I usually respond to such plans with an admonishment, "Focus. That's bad for morale," but I know Mike is gung-ho and determined, so I keep mum. Besides, after a 2:21 1000m in practice last week, he is overflowing with confidence. We talk briefly about his girlfriend's adventures in the modeling and acting scene down in NY. He asks me whether I could ever date someone I wasn't attracted to. (Note to reader: skip to the next installment to avoid more amateur philosophical ramblings.) I tell him that ideally I would not judge people on their appearance, as looks (for the most part) are the one feature beyond a person's control. I go out on a limb and suggest that just as we look with embarrassment on the barbaric institutionalized racism practiced in this country 35 years ago, in fifty years, our current practice of considering outward physical appearance in forming romantic relationships may be viewed as primitive.

Mike points out that we can't help whom we're attracted to. I concede this point and admit that I don't even make an effort to live up to my theoretical ideals, but I like being contrary. Although we will never be able to program ourselves to ignore looks and be attracted to a certain type of personality, influential cultural authorities could certainly start emphasizing other attributes besides appearance. Hollywood moguls could cast normal looking actors in the protagonist roles and make the studious flute-playing band camp-attending girl the most sought-after prom date in American Pie instead of the gorgeous foreign exchange student. The editors of Men's Health and Cosmo could extol the virtues of philanthropy and good conversations instead of advising us on how to improve our complexion and strengthen our abs.

Rhodes (Reebok Enclave 800 meter runner in search of the time) and I indulge in hummus sandwiches for lunch. We get a little nostalgic about the summer of '96, most of which I spent squatting in his grad-school room at Princeton. It was the summer after I graduated, and I was, in theory, staying on campus to use the career-center to find a job. In reality, I took trips to the Jersey shore and we plotted how to lure women up to his bachelor pad. And most importantly, I introduced Jason to hummus.

After lunch, Steve Myers stops by and we lament the speed-goggles phenomenon. Why are women so attracted to the fast guys, oblivious to their many (we imagine) personality flaws. We fail to acknowledge the likelihood that consistently winning races builds confidence, which, in turn, livens up personality and improves interactions with potential mates. I privately conclude that we are both bitter because we have never been the beneficiaries of the ubiquitous goggles. And then I realize the hypocrisy of my earlier thoughts on the immorality of being attracted to people based on their looks. Why is there such contempt for women with speed-goggles? Or for money hungry gold-diggers, for that matter? At least speed and money, unlike good looks, usually reflect something within a guy's control, a good work ethic. (Cynics might reasonably argue that natural talent and inheritance also play a big role in making someone fast and rich.)

At around 4 pm, I embark on my pre-race shakeout run. I am not as worried about the status of my legs as I was earlier in the week because my legs felt phenomenal yesterday. Granted, I was only running 7 minute pace for about 30 minutes, but the rest should make me feel better today. Sure enough, I feel just as bouncy as yesterday. Terrance and I run out six minutes and back six on a trail in the nearby woods. A burned out car, which I remember from last year, marks the end of our trek; a strategically placed old mattress and scattering of cans and bottles extend beyond a thin wall of nearby trees. The scarcity of alcoholic containers impresses us and debunks the cliché that there is nothing to do up in Maine but drink.

After the run, some active isolated stretching, and a clif bar, I try to get through an article on technology and globalization, but my focus is gone. I decide this is a good thing and abandon the magazine in favor of Midnight Run on TNT. Save up the mental energy for that third lap.

Editor's Note: After writing this journal, Scott wrote LetsRun.com and said, "I've been lacking inspiration since Sunday (when he didn't qualify), thus the delay and lack of quality of this entry. I am working on the next part of this entry which describes the build up to the race and the race itself and should have it to you soon. Also feel free to edit out all the philosophical crap if you think it's too boring."

No worries Scott. We find the philosophical musings very entertaining and haven't edited a thing.

 
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