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RE: You might be a runner if.....
You have a very distinct "watch tan"
...and sports bra tan (for the ladies) and shorts tan, i.e. your thighs are as white as your rear
Your sport is other sports' punishment
Your heart rate is below 50 and you are not dying
You have some nasty veins in your feet and ankles
If you turn to the side and stick your tongue out, you somehow resemble a zipper

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