[ Return to Index ] [ Original Message ]Original Message
By entering these forums you agree to our Rules
on the logo to return to our homepage
|Subject: ||RE: Post-nuptial shutoff?|
Girl Next Door, what exactly are your needs? Are your complaints about how your husband treats you in bed (he flips you over and wordlessly starts banging, then turns over and goes to sleep when he finishes), or has he spaced out on you in other things (not helpful, not talkative, not responsible)? What did he say after you talked to him?
You want people to be supportive of you, but you're not being very clear about what your exact complaint is.
If he expresses his feelings in a way that's different than how you express your feelings, don't hold that against him. It sounds like you want verbal confirmation and compliments, and he may not be used to showing affection verbally. Look for the ways that he does show affection and reciprocate in kind, because those are the signs he recognizes. There's nothing wrong with telling him that you'd like him to verbally express his love for you more often, but you have to be clear about what you want and not expect him to change overnight. If he makes an effort, appreciate that. Tell him that you love him and let him say he loves you too. Tell him he looks nice today and let him say that you look nice too. He'll learn by mirroring your behavior, but don't expect him to have the words all ready on his own if he's not used to communicating that way. And don't force him to always communicate your way. Learn to recognize and appreciate his way of showing he loves you.
To combat message board spam (by non runners). We are making people answer a brief question before they can post on a thread that is over 20 days old.
If you answer this question you should be able to post.