what does it mean when a HS coach says this?

ask the coach what it means.

oturn wrote:

"We cooperate with parents"

It is easy to speculate on this but I am asking specifically of either coaches who have said this to parents or parents who have been on the receiving end of these comments. What does that mean? Give me the specifics.

Is that offer extended to all parents in a given team or just some? Is there any expectation/responsibility of the parents who receive this offer?

Please state if you are a coach or a parent when you respond.

son is in the 8th grade and a pretty good runner.

yes troll, ask the coach!

I would think that it means that if you, as a parent, have a concern, he will listen to it and make changes as appropriate. He won't bow to all demands since they may not be best for the team (e.g. there may be non-negotiable attendance requirements because it wouldn't be good for the team for practice to be optional), but something like "my son's got some foot pain, could he skip a workout and take it easy for a few days?" he would listen.

I'm just guessing though. Ask the coach.

oturn wrote:

"We cooperate with parents"

It is easy to speculate on this but I am asking specifically of either coaches who have said this to parents or parents who have been on the receiving end of these comments. What does that mean? Give me the specifics.

Is that offer extended to all parents in a given team or just some? Is there any expectation/responsibility of the parents who receive this offer?

Please state if you are a coach or a parent when you respond.

son is in the 8th grade and a pretty good runner.

Coach here. It is a dumb thing to say.

I coach athletes, not their parents. I expect for athletes to communicate with me, and I expect for parents to encourage their kids to develop the life skill of communicating with adults / superiors.

Well, hopefully it means that we work together with parents to create the final product of a mature, societally functioning adult!

Is it really hard to understand what 'cooperate' means?

The coach will work with parents to limit inconveniences .

It's freaking 8th grade so kids have little control over their schedule.

EX: If kid have a doctors appointment, let coach know so he/she can make that convenient for everyone (won't schedule big workout that day/keep family late).

EX: My other son has a baseball tournament this weekend, little Johnny won't be at the meet on Friday.

EX: If a parent notices their kid limping at home, tell the coach so we can help him rest.

My lord.

theJeff wrote:

Coach here. It is a dumb thing to say.

I coach athletes, not their parents.

In what world is cooperating with all stakeholders a dumb thing? That's the definition of a successfully run program.

Side note: You don't coach athletes - you coach with student-athletes. To think you're an educator...

oturn wrote:

"We cooperate with parents"

It is easy to speculate on this but I am asking specifically of either coaches who have said this to parents or parents who have been on the receiving end of these comments. What does that mean? Give me the specifics.

Is that offer extended to all parents in a given team or just some? Is there any expectation/responsibility of the parents who receive this offer?

Please state if you are a coach or a parent when you respond.

son is in the 8th grade and a pretty good runner.

I am a coach. I doubt if the OP is a troll. (I've often wondered exactly what that means anyway.)

People say powerful sentences like that. Often they mean very little.

I was a coach for many years.

macdaddy wrote:

theJeff wrote:

Coach here. It is a dumb thing to say.

I coach athletes, not their parents.

In what world is cooperating with all stakeholders a dumb thing? That's the definition of a successfully run program.

Side note: You don't coach athletes - you coach with student-athletes. To think you're an educator...

"Cooperation" can be a loaded word and implies movement on both sides. There are certainly elements of the program that I'm unwilling to change because a parent wants them changed. I am willing to listen to them, however, and that is how I phrase this idea. I welcome questions, suggestions, criticism (assuming it is constructive in nature), etc. I don't believe I have ever used the word "cooperate" when discussing my relationship to parents though. Yes, I coach (currently at the high school level, but for previously for 12 years at the middle school level).

theJeff wrote:

oturn wrote:

"We cooperate with parents"

It is easy to speculate on this but I am asking specifically of either coaches who have said this to parents or parents who have been on the receiving end of these comments. What does that mean? Give me the specifics.

Is that offer extended to all parents in a given team or just some? Is there any expectation/responsibility of the parents who receive this offer?

Please state if you are a coach or a parent when you respond.

son is in the 8th grade and a pretty good runner.

Coach here. It is a dumb thing to say.

I coach athletes, not their parents. I expect for athletes to communicate with me, and I expect for parents to encourage their kids to develop the life skill of communicating with adults / superiors.

What you have said is a slightly more complete way of handling things. Yes, you do coach the athletes. However

you still want to be friendly with anyone who comes your way in coaching whether it be parents, administrators,

opponents, etc. I do not think it wise to say someone said a dumb thing.

It may have been incomplete.

He only said that in hopes that it would get you to be quiet.

He regrets it already.

Yo, OP.

You sound like your 'very fast' 8th grader is your oldest or only? This sounds like an experienced coach was placating you when you asked him to help out your special Timmy. Sorry that's harsh, but that's how I'm thinking that coach is feeling about you.

I'm the parent of 4, the youngest in high school at an NXN bound program. I've got lots of experience with coaches who've taken my kids to a national level. I expect my kids coach to COMMUNICATE with parents. But COOPERATE? Nope. My view - and I'd suggest yours should be to back up a few steps, guide your kid to try their hardest, do what the coaches say. And otherwise you STFU and enjoy your kids journey through life and sports.

Means if you sleep with the coach, your son will play

The John wrote:

theJeff wrote:

Coach here. It is a dumb thing to say.

I coach athletes, not their parents. I expect for athletes to communicate with me, and I expect for parents to encourage their kids to develop the life skill of communicating with adults / superiors.

What you have said is a slightly more complete way of handling things. Yes, you do coach the athletes. However

you still want to be friendly with anyone who comes your way in coaching whether it be parents, administrators,

opponents, etc. I do not think it wise to say someone said a dumb thing.

It may have been incomplete.

Agreed that calling things "dumb" in general isn't productive.

It is an unwise sentiment to introduce. There is an assumption that coaches will cooperate with parents. To make the statement introduces the idea that maybe some coaches DON'T cooperate with parents.

Of course we cooperate with parents... through the STUDENT-athlete (that was for an earlier poster).

theJeff wrote:

oturn wrote:

Coach here. It is a dumb thing to say.

I coach athletes, not their parents. I expect for athletes to communicate with me, and I expect for parents to encourage their kids to develop the life skill of communicating with adults / superiors.

This.

High school kids are there to learn to run, to compete, to lose, and to develop life skills that will carry them through to their next developmental stage.

Here are a couple of specifics from my experience as a coach:

If an athlete’s parent hires a private coach for their kid, and the parent asks you if the private coach can be at the next high school meet and talk to the athlete, cooperating with the parent would mean letting the private coach help.

If an athlete’s parent shows up to help officiate the morning (JV) portion of an all day meet and says he is requiring his son (the star athlete) to work with him all morning as punishment for staying out late, cooperating with the parent would mean allowing him to do so, even though the athlete was scheduled to compete in the invitational section that evening.

Parents naturally believe that, in times of disagreement, they know better than the coach what is in their child’s best interests. I think that “cooperating with parents” means that you will allow them to have at least some input into your decision making process when those conflicts arise.

What does it mean when a female cross country coach tells me I have a nice a$$ ?

I personally thought I was going to get laid. But, no.

Damn

I am a coach. I doubt if the OP is a troll. (I've often wondered exactly what that means anyway.)

People say powerful sentences like that. [/quote]

"If you're looking around the poker table for the mark, then guess what? You're the mark."

"Powerful sentences" might enter the LRC lexicon...

If just means he won't kick Jimmy off the team if he goes to band camp.