I hate homeless people confronting me for money

Live to run wrote:

Back Bay '75 wrote:

Thanks for sharing. Having been homeless for two years after serving in Vietnam and losing a limb, I have a different perspective. I can't blame you for not knowing what it is like to be homeless, or even for not knowing that it is something that happens to good people, not jerks. What baffles me is that you are proud of your ignorance and callousness. The answer lies in the film "Twelve Angry Men", it's is no doubt "because it is how you were raised."

I assume you're now out of that situation seeing as Vietnam was decades ago and you mentioned you were homeless for 2 years. How did you get out of it? I'd love to hear the story.

My sister found me. She and her husband got me in touch with the VA sometime in around 1978. I eventually attended community college, then moved to UMass Boston and slowly put together enough credits for a B.A. I got a grant to get an M.S. in social work and had a good career doing counseling. It didn't make me rich but it got me a retirement. But my sister and her husband are the ones who really saved me, plus some good docs at the V.A. Also, distance running saved me. I don't know what would have happened to me if I had lost a leg, rather than an arm. Anyhow, thanks for asking. Peace on Earth.

The great majority of homeless are felons, sex offenders or druggies. There are tons of programs but unfortunately you can’t force someone to get help. They often victimize tax payers by burglarizing their vehicles, homes and persons. If someone legitimately wants help then guide them but the great majority wants a handout for their next fix. The world is a mean place and most problems are not as simple as giving hugs and kisses.

Rme wrote:...most problems are not as simple as giving hugs and kisses.

Some problems can be made just a little easier to survive with exactly that...

The world isn't a mean place. The world has nothing to do with it. What you mean to say is that there are a lot of mean people in the world. We all have a choice to be mean, or not.

I frequently travel to cities with a lot of homeless people. I agree with you many homeless people are felons, mostly having committed petty crimes to feed addiction. Many of them are "druggies." And many of them are forced, by circumstance, into sex work, although I doubt and challenge your assertion that there are more "sex offenders" among them than in the general population. In my own personal experience, the most common characteristic among street people is some form of mental illness, and the second most common might be a history of family or domestic violence they've escaped from into the streets. Successful violent criminals don't choose to live on the streets or beg you loose change.

yeah but... wrote:What you mean to say is that there are a lot of mean people in the world. We all have a choice to be mean, or not.

Claiming as a truism that the world is a mean place is an easy rationalization for being mean, nothing more. One can easily reframe that statement to make a basis for practising kindness rather than meanness.

Maybe that reads like pithy preaching, but if your Jesus were here, I feel like that's WHWD (heretofore-trademarked acronym for "what He would do"...)

Dave99 wrote:

when ever my they ask my grandpa for money he literally tells them to gtf away from him. i dont like it either but i just tell them no

I hate rich people

mucus pus dairy wrote:

Proverbs 21:13

He who shuts his ear to the cry of the poor will also cry himself and not be answered.

Agreed, the torah does teach us to care for the poor, the foreigner, and the widow!

Jesus was a torah teacher and was well acquainted with his father's word (what we call the old testament today), this is what he taught from. Sometimes, it seems that modern churches have forgotten this....

Listen to what God had to say on the subject: if they would not work, let them starve.

2 Thessalonians 3.10 “For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat.”

"The LORD maketh poor, and maketh rich: he bringeth low, and lifteth up." 1 Samuel 2:7

God makes people poor and homeless: who are we to give them alms?

I don't like them, either. As I understand it, homeless bums already receive welfare and food stamps, so why exactly do they need more money from me or anyone else? Why can't they get jobs like the rest of us?

Live to run wrote:

Spoiler alert: your grandpa is going to hell. There he can have a great time telling all the demons injecting hot lead in his rectum to gtf away from him. Good times.

Don't be influenced by your grandpa. You can be a better person and evolve.

I used to have the same attitude to the homeless. Now I try to think about what got them into that situation, and how easily it could happen to anyone. I try to have a conversation with them, to offer that human connection. If you think you can control mental illness, or other factors that can lead to a downward spiral in anyone including CEOs, good luck.

What an ignornat fool you are. I don't doubt that some of the homeless people have some type of mental illness. However, many of them are just incredibly lazy and refuse to work because they know that some pathetic wimp who "feels sorry for them" will just give them money which they turn around and use to support their unproductive antisocial lifestyle.

And if a homeless person does have mental illness, how will giving them a dollar really help them? I could maybe understand if you got that person some type of counseling, but giving that person spare change isn't going to help that person in a real way.

Let me help you reframe these:

Diamond555 wrote:(1) And if a homeless person does have mental illness, how will giving them a dollar really help them?

(2) I could maybe understand if you got that person some type of counseling, but giving that person spare change isn't going to help that person in a real way.

(1) And if a homeless person does have mental illness, how will giving them a dollar really hurt you? In other words, what is it costing you. If you really need that pocket change, I don't begrudge you hanging onto it. We all have needs. But if you don't, then you lose nothing by giving it away.

(2) A little bit of human kindness goes a long way, and is much better value for money than a counselling session, which is of course impractical or impossible for you to give away (unless maybe you happen to be a counsellor donating your time to street folk).

Homeless people are homeless because of their own bad decisions. If you're homeless in USA, it's probably your own fault. Don't give money to homeless people.

This reminds me of a discussion I had with my well-educated (engineer, masters degree) sibling-in-law about health care:

Reagan1 wrote:Homeless people are homeless because of their own bad decisions. If you're homeless in USA, it's probably your own fault. Don't give money to homeless people.

Her argument (easily made from the perspective of an employee of one of the major auto makers, with maybe the best health care coverage in the US) was that if all those poor folk with $hitty coverage would just get off their asses and find good jobs, they'd have good coverage too. You see, most people without health coverage are too lazy to get themselves looked after.

Maybe you believe that too? I was gobsmacked and dumbfounded. Or maybe I was just stupid...

Reagan1 wrote:

Homeless people are homeless because of their own bad decisions. If you're homeless in USA, it's probably your own fault. Don't give money to homeless people.

+1

The jobless rate is below 4%, the lowest ever (thanks President Trump), so if you need money you can get a job.

But it's easier to hold up a sign with a lie on it and be stoned at the same time.

When I was in college I would give homeless people money if I had a little too spare, however now as an adult who had worked as a social worker desling with the homeless population for the past 8 years I do not give anyone on the street money, i'll refer them to an organization that provides services but never give cash. In most cities it's easy to get food, shelter and support of you are looking, its mental health services that are harder to find.

Dude, you realize drug addiction/alcohol is only about 25% cause of homelessness? Mental health is about 25% as well. So that leaves poverty as 50% cause which can be helped WITH MONEY.

Who told you those statistics?

I detest poor people just as much as the next guy, but while we're venting let me just add that people who are equally detestable include: homosexuals, immigrants, refugees, rape victims, public shooting survivors, endangered and/or extinct animals, people of success who believe wholeheartedly their success is a result of thier efforts and and their efforts alone,

BASICALLY, if someone or somebody isn't immediately relatable to me my instinct is to despise them. This is natural.

Joshua- wrote:

mucus pus dairy wrote:

Proverbs 21:13

He who shuts his ear to the cry of the poor will also cry himself and not be answered.

Agreed, the torah does teach us to care for the poor, the foreigner, and the widow!

Jesus was a torah teacher and was well acquainted with his father's word (what we call the old testament today), this is what he taught from. Sometimes, it seems that modern churches have forgotten this....

Listen to what God had to say on the subject: if they would not work, let them starve.

2 Thessalonians 3.10 “For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat.”

"The LORD maketh poor, and maketh rich: he bringeth low, and lifteth up." 1 Samuel 2:7

God makes people poor and homeless: who are we to give them alms?

Read the verses in context:

1 Samuel verse, Hannah just gave birth to Samuel, after being in a deep depression, unable to conceive. Her prayer, which this verse is a part of, is more out of reverence for God, a recognition of his sovereignty.

In 2nd Thessalonians, Paul is making the point to not live an evil life, emphasizing that those refusing to work are also choosing to live an evil life (maybe they were staying home getting drunk?), as written in verse 11.

I don't think these verses can be used to justify not giving to the poor and needy living amongst us, but thank you for providing your input.

Also, I would add that of course giving 10 or 20 bucks to a homeless person is not going to turn their life around, and I understand the point that it could enable them to fund their drug habit if they are dealing with addiction. I guess, by giving money (or information on community resources) we are giving these people hope and letting them know that someone cares.

but she was sorta hot wrote:

I usually ignore the panhandlers. However, the other day outside our Albertson's grocery store, a girl in her 20's (I'd guess) was panhandling, and she was actually sorta hot. I gave her a couple bucks, and when I did I noticed that she had a decent stash of cash, and had been collecting quite well. So, I'm guessing a bunch of other loser guys (that's me) were also willing to crack open the wallet for a hot chick who was panhandling. I guess I am a (or we are) sexist jerks for giving to the hot homeless chick?

I, too, frequently encounter sorta hot homeless women asking me for money. Unfortunately, though, one particular hot homeless hottie favors the flakka, I believe, and this will not end well for her. I usually tell her "you've got enough," or "what are you on," when she asks.

My friend called some years ago laughing about a group that wanted the State of North Dakoka to buy milk for poor kids in public schools.

He said if poor kids start getting free stuff when they are little, they will think the world owes them a free living when they grow up.

Thank God the legislature turned this deal down.