What's the longest crush you've ever had?

April 2016 to February 2017

I focused only on one girl. Didn't care about others.

I've had about 6 chances for hookups and dating, and one girl was throwing herself at me but no, I didn't do it.

I only regret focusing on that one girl when I think about this:

Did she give a shite about me at all?

:(

Going on 10 years now, married her 7 years ago. Still makes my heart skip a beat.

Heartwrecked wrote:

Normally my crushes last a few months or until I get to know how imperfect the person is and the bubble pops, but this time I have had a crush that is verging on painful for 2.5 years with no signs of going away. It's actually a girl that I got to know a little bit and went out with a few times before she moved across the country. I feel totally enamored with her and still desperately want to spend time with her, even though I admit I don't know her very well. She seems like literally the perfect woman for me. It really sucks.

What's the longest crush you've ever had?

What young people must recognize is there is not much difference looks wise between people in the 16-28 age group. For the most part you are all good looking. I learned this too late. I'm telling you this for your own good. Give the girls who are only 99% a chance. You will be glad you did!!!

I agree. However, my lasting crush is based on who the person is. Most would consider her quite plain Jane, but I can't stop thinking about her. I've had other crushes that are more based on looks alone, but this one is different. It makes me wonder if perhaps it's more than just a crush.

Two to three years, I think, she was in and out of town, lived in Europe for a year, etc. I finally asked her out, she said "maybe," lol. The o e answer i wasn't prepared for. To be fair she was getting close to finals of her senior year.

I didn't know her at all, that was the point of havig a date.

She ended up dating one of my best friends while I was out of town, and aunt nice I learned what I learned about her from him, the spell was broken. She wasn't to bright, it turned out so I felt no loss.

Instead I felt good that I took the chance to ask her out cold.

Is this what type of threads get started on here when they let out school for the summer? Sure brings back some memories.

In my adult experience, pretty much every woman that I meet and don't get to know in any significant detail becomes forgettable in no more than a week. Doesn't matter who or what they are. Only if we meet up a few times or get naked together do they stick in my memory.

Crushes have become a part of the nostalgia of youth and inexperience. Once you realize what the game is all about l, you simply have no time for such lingering nonsense.

But old crushes die hard. I still would like to bang my buddy's sister that I've known since we were 14, although it clearly would be a bad idea, for a number of reasons. And then there is this gal that I worked with for a summer when I was 19, and I thought she was just amazing then and for too long afterwards. But when you figured out that even model quality looks and a pleasant surface personality can hide a nightmare of a person or an incompatible relationship, the sheen wears off. It can take awhile for you to remove the blinders and realize they ain't nearly as special as you think they are.

20 years, liked a girl, then me and my family moved to a far away state, lost all contact with her, but still had the crush, completely over it now.

Going on 25 years. Dated her in college. Still think of her often.

Vivalarepublica wrote:

Is this what type of threads get started on here when they let out school for the summer? Sure brings back some memories.

In my adult experience, pretty much every woman that I meet and don't get to know in any significant detail becomes forgettable in no more than a week. Doesn't matter who or what they are. Only if we meet up a few times or get naked together do they stick in my memory.

Crushes have become a part of the nostalgia of youth and inexperience. Once you realize what the game is all about l, you simply have no time for such lingering nonsense.

But old crushes die hard.

100% true. I've been married 4 years now and am in love with my wife. Every so often I'll meet a woman I "crush" on, but it wears off quickly because you learn that crushes are fueled primarily by fantasy. The reality is she probably farts in her sleep or has borderline personality disorder.

BUT, I still haven't gotten over my first "love" when I was 14. We were on again/off again all through high school, but she broke my heart and dated my friends and I could never trust her enough to try again. I still dream about her 17 years later and wake up in cold sweats. The emotions are so real it can take hours to wear off.

But yeah, she probably farts in her sleep.

I've been there (and still am). I stopped crushing on this girl when I got a new job and moved far away. So I said, oh well, I don't want a distance relationship. Then by sheer luck 2 years later she got a job and moved to the same city I was working and living in. So now we probably live near each other but it would be kind of weird talk again.

Vivalarepublica wrote:

BTW did anything ever come of that girl who was pursuing you via the message boards?

30 years.

Found out two years ago I could have had a short four years ago. So it's worse.

9 years, still strong but unrequited (since med school).

moose wrote:

Vivalarepublica wrote:

BTW did anything ever come of that girl who was pursuing you via the message boards?

Lol, forgot about that. No, didn't amount to anything but a few emails.

Grace Kelly since I was about 10...

Oh man, I had one go off an on about 10 years. Fell in love with this girl at first sight on the bus in 8th grade, she was my brand of a 10 and we really hit it off. It was the type of deal where we'd get super close over the course of a few weeks, then she'd start dating some other dude out of nowhere (sometimes it would be dudes that weren't my good friends, but kinda acquaintance friends). We'd drift away for a few months or more then somehow she would either randomly somehow get connected back or find ways to get back in my life. Every time started with me 'okay, not doing this again, no matter what don't get invested' sure enough at some point we're like an old couple having some late night chat on a couch, then she's got a new boyfriend. She did tell me at one point late in this 'relationship' that she felt she didn't deserve me, whatever. She once managed to move to the city I was in for college, look me up, repeat the cycle, then complete the cycle with a roommate of mine and try to sabotage a secondary relationship I had moved onto.

Clearly looking back I was an insecure bozo with no self esteem and nothing to really offer at the time. She was getting her emotional energy or building her self esteem with me or something, then moving on to someone else. For a long time I thought she was intentionally seeking me out to repeat the cycle like some sort of sociopath, but she probably just lived her life that way unintentionally. One of those situations where 'I wish I knew then what I know now'.

10+ years later I still think of her from time to time but the crush is gone. In the petty part of my brain I get happiness knowing I have a hot wife and nice career and that she (because well, social media) had a baby with some loser we went to HS with, unsure if they married (Facebook stalking only went a single click). She's still hot though, at least as of 5ish years ago.

40 years this September.

First day of college, I was smitten. Became friends, but otherwise unrequited.

A couple years after graduation, she contacts me. We get together a few times, as friends, again. I still had a major crush on her, but didn't pursue that aspect for fear of losing the friendship. Always felt that was a stress on our friendship during college.

Meanwhile, I was dating other ladies, and got engaged. Then was totally shocked when my "crush" asked, "Did you ever think of asking ME?" Ummm ...

Spent the months before my wedding in anguish ... break my fiancee's heart, and take another chance with my "crush," or stay the path. Decided to go ahead with the wedding.

Fast forward 15 years, a divorce and two kids later, I am about to propose to another lady. My crush was married with a child by then (we had kept in touch, off and on). I considered contacting her, just to be sure she was still unavailable, but decided to just get over her, and move on.

A week after getting engaged to this new lady, I scrolled through my email, and saw one I missed from 8 days before. From my "crush": "I'm divorced, and wondering how you are doing."

Fast forward another 15 years: After going ahead with my planned second marriage, I am very happy and love my wife, but still wake in the middle of the night, having dreams of my crush ... where we are both still young, and struggling with big life decisions.

You are the very definition of involuntary celibacy.

Afraid of and intimacy/sex so , find too many faults after "crushing" for a few months if the girl/woman is in your area, or pick someone unavailable so that you can stay on the shelf and fool yourself that maybe, just maybe if everything were right you would actually be involved in real relationship.

Going on 12 years now. We were coworkers, I was soon to be engaged, she had a long term BF. So it was unrealistic from the beginning. But it was clear we were completely infatuated with one another. She changed jobs, I got married, but we stayed in touch. Just some random emails/texts to update each other. But about 6 years ago some of the texts definitely crossed the line. At the time my wife and I were deciding on whether to start a family. I decided it was time to either divorce and give it a shot or quit with the fantasy. Did the latter, but jesus the sex would have been amazing. Those feelings don't completely go away.