Help me to difffuse this incredibly awkward holiday situation

Why couldn't he just go straight to the hotel the first night?

It's an air BNB...I guess there wasn't a room available in the area until tonight?

Why are you living with your mother's boyfriend?

It's not your problem. Your mom should have told her boyfriend if it was really no big deal. The fact that she didn't tell him tells me there are larger issues in that relationship, and you're probably going to get your mommy & daddy back by New Years.

Your mom really gets around, doesn't she?

Help!! wrote:

It's a long and complicated story, so I'll just give the cliffs

-parents divorced a long time ago, but are amicable.

-dad lives far away

-dad flew into town for christmas, asked to stay with my mom for one night before he moved into a hotel

-mom has been seeing a guy for a long time. I'm currently living with him. when she told me my dad was staying with her last night, I told her bad idea, but if he does, don't tell her boyfriend. she didn't tell him.

- mom's boyfriend found out about dad sleeping over and is pissed and hurt that she didn't tell him.

I feel caught in the middle.

1. you live with your mom's boyfriend?

2. you're dad actually wants to stay with his ex? I'd rather sleep on a park bench than at my ex's house

3. he should be pissed

Kranky wrote:

Your mom really gets around, doesn't she?

I can attest to this

I too have plowed your mom

Not much you can do now besides wait for this to slide into the past.

Lesson learned, that was bad advice.

Who cares. True love doesn't exist.

The worst part will be when the boyfriend kicks you out.

Hmmm..... wrote:

It's not your problem. Your mom should have told her boyfriend if it was really no big deal. The fact that she didn't tell him tells me there are larger issues in that relationship.

Right answer. OP isn't in the middle of anything.

If the boyfriend cannot see it for what you claim it is or the two cannot communicate, or there isn't trust, or .... There is work to do in that relationship. None of which involves OP.

There are few things in the world worse than stepparents and dating/divorced parents. I have been through almost a dozen boyfriends/girlfriends between my father and mother. I am fortunate that I only have a single set of stepparents after my mother and father finally remarried. Some people end up with multiple stepparents and all sorts of half brothers/sisters, etc. But it has always been awful having to deal with some stranger coming into your family with a big long laundry list of issues and needs. You really have to realize very quickly that you just cannot win no matter what you do. So, just do everything you can to steer clear of it, get out of the house as soon as you can and build your own life free and clear of all the messes your parents have made.

Parents who divorce should act like adults and protect their children from the ups and downs of dating and remarrying. But they never do. You just have to accept the fact that your parents are just regular people who will do stupid things and have problems in their relationships. That is not your problem and never should be.

Thanks for literally the only piece of constructive advice in this thread

You're just skipping over the part where OP tells his mom not to tell the boyfriend about the dad staying over? It wasn't his problem until he counseled his mother to deceive his roommate.

pop_pop!_v2.2.1 wrote:

Hmmm..... wrote:

It's not your problem. Your mom should have told her boyfriend if it was really no big deal. The fact that she didn't tell him tells me there are larger issues in that relationship.

Right answer. OP isn't in the middle of anything.

If the boyfriend cannot see it for what you claim it is or the two cannot communicate, or there isn't trust, or .... There is work to do in that relationship. None of which involves OP.

What kind of stupid parents do you have that your dad wants to sleep over his ex-wife's place AND she says yes??

And then you advise her not to tell her (current) boyfriend, when it's totally OBVIOUS to everyone in the world that he would eventually find out. And why the f--k are you living with your mother's boyfriend and not your mother or father?

Good luck with your self-inflicted "holiday situation".

So did your parents hook up during dad's visit?

I am thinking about doing your mom tonight. Please do both of us a favor and don't tell your dad. Thanks.

Trump! Trump! Trump! Trump!

Help!! wrote:

It's a long and complicated story...mom has been seeing a guy for a long time. I'm currently living with him.

This is the complicated bit.

As with any potential awkward situation, copious amounts of alcohol.