I'm 32 and have serious issues with professionalism

Firstly, congratulations for being self-aware enough to recognize your issues. Seriously.

Second, see a good therapist. Get recommendations from someone you trust. Seriously, get help. You're no less of a man for it.

Lastly, you're 32. You're still young and no mistake will ruin your life. We've all been there. Just make the next opportunity your best.

Don't seek therapy.

Just find a job where people don't piss you off that much. People will always piss you off because frankly people are stupid (average IQ ~ 100), but at least there will be jobs where you can manage. Or maybe not. Maybe you should sell pot or something

Love your music, dude.

I can understand, at least partially. I'm a reliable employee and at least semi-competent at my job, but really don't enjoy the people part of it at all. I work at being polite to everyone and think I generally succeed. Thankfully, my job involves more numbers than people.

What grinds my gears, though, are the expected attendance at happy hours and group lunches, the inane office pool and fantasy football talk (I don't participate but am still subjected to the dumb conversations), and other mindless water cooler talk. I've learned to grin and bare it, but it still irritates me.

Still have to play nice, though. There are likely annoying things about me that they have to put up with, too. Putting up with each other is part of being human.

guy with guy wrote:

Don't seek therapy.

Just find a job where people don't piss you off that much. People will always piss you off because frankly people are stupid (average IQ ~ 100), but at least there will be jobs where you can manage. Or maybe not. Maybe you should sell pot or something

All bad advice. One cannot go through life avoiding problems.

Same here, I'm 29 and I can feel the heat coming down on me at my job because of some dumb crap that trickles down from above and around me. Been fired from a previous job because someone didn't like me. I refuse to play the office politics game. But it's really hard to keep your mouth shut when the people above you are the major source of your problems.

Best thing to do is work on getting along with others better and seek a different job. Maybe focus on working for yourself rather than working for others.

Get a job where you don't have to deal with these types of people. It can be done and it makes working fun.

Become a writer/freelance.

Investor relations. Financial services. Biotech. HR. Whatever.

Maybe you should do a job like construction or wood working, laying tile, or something that is 100% dependent on you?

Vivalarepublica wrote:

Same here, I'm 29 and I can feel the heat coming down on me at my job because of some dumb crap that trickles down from above and around me. Been fired from a previous job because someone didn't like me. I refuse to play the office politics game. But it's really hard to keep your mouth shut when the people above you are the major source of your problems.

I remember when I thought that everything that happened was someone else's fault.

You can certainly express your views but doing so tactfully is a better approach. Diplomacy is the art of telling someone to go to hell in such a way that they will enjoy the trip. (Churchill?)

guy with guy wrote:

Don't seek therapy.

Just find a job where people don't piss you off that much. People will always piss you off because frankly people are stupid (average IQ ~ 100), but at least there will be jobs where you can manage. Or maybe not. Maybe you should sell pot or something

Wrong answer. He will not get a good paying job until he learns how to deal with authority. The complaints he is making are for things he would fire someone for if his job was to manage someone like himself. This is why he needs a therapist: to confront his inner demons.

Vivalarepublica wrote:

But it's really hard to keep your mouth shut when the people above you are the major source of your problems.

What you fail to see about yourself is that you would very likely be an underlings problem if you were the higher up. You would be the one dishing out dumb crap.

He doesn't have to go through life dealing with a$$holes. Not every job is like that.

right answer wrote:

He doesn't have to go through life dealing with a$$holes. Not every job is like that.

Every job will involve something that pisses you off. Even great jobs have occasional frustrations. If you lose control of yourself every time something pisses you off, you aren't going to be suited for any job that's worth having.

Changing jobs isn't going to help. He needs to figure out why he is reacting the way he is, and fix that issue. Everyone gets pissed. Almost no one does something to get themselves fired because they're pissed.

Bob Sacamano wrote:

I can understand, at least partially. I'm a reliable employee and at least semi-competent at my job, but really don't enjoy the people part of it at all. I work at being polite to everyone and think I generally succeed. Thankfully, my job involves more numbers than people.

What grinds my gears, though, are the expected attendance at happy hours and group lunches, the inane office pool and fantasy football talk (I don't participate but am still subjected to the dumb conversations), and other mindless water cooler talk. I've learned to grin and bare it, but it still irritates me.

.

This could be the problem with your coworkers. If you bare "it" at the water cooler.

deal with the real issue wrote:

right answer wrote:

He doesn't have to go through life dealing with a$$holes. Not every job is like that.

Every job will involve something that pisses you off. Even great jobs have occasional frustrations. If you lose control of yourself every time something pisses you off, you aren't going to be suited for any job that's worth having.

Changing jobs isn't going to help. He needs to figure out why he is reacting the way he is, and fix that issue. Everyone gets pissed. Almost no one does something to get themselves fired because they're pissed.

Wrong. Not every job is like that. He doesn't have to take $hit from these people. Some jobs entail lots of this kind of stress and some jobs almost none.

right answer wrote:

Wrong. Not every job is like that. He doesn't have to take $hit from these people. Some jobs entail lots of this kind of stress and some jobs almost none.

He ultimately needs to figure out why he is reacting to "this kind of stress" the way he is. Most people don't respond to stress by committing fireable offenses.

Sure, getting a different job might be part of the solution, but if he doesn't address his issues, it's just a bandaid. Again, all jobs involve some kind of stress with some frequency (yes, it might be different kinds of stress...I didn't claim otherwise). If he can't control himself, why is he going to respond any better to whatever annoyances exist in any other job?

Bob Sacamano wrote:

What grinds my gears, though, are the expected attendance at happy hours and group lunches, the inane office pool and fantasy football talk (I don't participate but am still subjected to the dumb conversations), and other mindless water cooler talk. I've learned to grin and bare it, but it still irritates me.

What is dumb about fantasy football conversations?