Is it classless to break up with gf on my birthday?

How long have you been dating?

7 months

My suggestion would be to wait 3 weeks or so unless the alternative is cheating on her.

I broke up with a girl on our 5 month "anniversary" some years ago. She was pissed about the timing. I think it would have been worse to drag things out while knowing I didn't want to be with her any more.

I say do it as soon as you can so you don't have to fake it. Keep it real.

@%&*%&)aslf057 wrote:

My suggestion would be to wait 3 weeks or so unless the alternative is cheating on her.

I gave that some thought, but she's going to pick up on me being distant. I didn't even respond when she sent a text this morning before she left for work.

I don't like faking. I don't like pretending. I just want to do what's best for her.

Do it today -- prior to dinner.

Breaking up with her out of the blue for no reason at all is being extremely hurtful.

You should think the reasons though and discuss them with her, rather then making a knee jerk reaction.

It is classless. There is a good chance she has planned a big surprise party for you and it will embarrass her a lot if you break up with her and she has to explain that to everyone at the party.

J.R. wrote:

Breaking up with her out of the blue for no reason at all is being extremely hurtful.

You should think the reasons though and discuss them with her, rather then making a knee jerk reaction.

One of the reasons I am breaking up is because I already explained reasons why I am unhappy. Her only response was, "I'm sorry you feel that way."

She knows the reasons.

You post on the LRC message board yet you worry about being classless? You're an enigma. Either that or an enema. I suspect the latter.

It's been seven months, so it's serious but not going to be too terrible. I recommend doing so before dinner tonight, and if it goes well she'll probably insist you keep the present. If you cannot bring yourself to do it, then I agree with the drop hints and wait at least a week.

Dude...do the birthday dinner, get the present, have the birthday sex. Then break up with her in a week or a week and a half. There's never an "ideal" time to breakup with someone, but on your birthday is way up on the list of "worst" times.

epwoifj wrote:

Dude...do the birthday dinner, get the present, have the birthday sex. Then break up with her in a week or a week and a half. There's never an "ideal" time to breakup with someone, but on your birthday is way up on the list of "worst" times.

Do it the way this guy says, then blow her off on Valentine's Day and she'll get the hint.

epwoifj wrote:

Dude...do the birthday dinner, get the present, have the birthday sex. Then break up with her in a week or a week and a half. There's never an "ideal" time to breakup with someone, but on your birthday is way up on the list of "worst" times.

A friend did that, she got pregnant, they got married, then divorced.

Time to move on wrote:

J.R. wrote:

Breaking up with her out of the blue for no reason at all is being extremely hurtful.

You should think the reasons though and discuss them with her, rather then making a knee jerk reaction.

One of the reasons I am breaking up is because I already explained reasons why I am unhappy. Her only response was, "I'm sorry you feel that way."

She knows the reasons.

Well then there's no reason to break up, because you already told her the reasons.

Wrap it before you tap it

epwoifj wrote:

Dude...do the birthday dinner, get the present, have the birthday sex. Then break up with her in a week or a week and a half. There's never an "ideal" time to breakup with someone, but on your birthday is way up on the list of "worst" times.

I get it, you want to do it a safe distance before Valentine Day (people - look at a calendar before you suggest a 3 week waiting period). Then he's suckered into a gift pre-breakup... no good.

Its true, this timing gives you a very small window of opportunity. But I have to agree that the Birthday Breakup is pretty horrible.

If b-day dinner is tonite (Weds 28) then you will probably have another date planed this weekend (aim for Sat Jan 31). Break up then. Its before the dreaded "two weeks before Valentines Day window" so you're safe there, and you have a few days after the Birthday to say "you know, we talked about whatever it was, you said you were sorry I feel that way, and I appreciate your concern, but I still feel that way, so I really think we should admit this isn't working..."

You've been putting up with her bs for 7 months. You deserve her gift and free meal. Let her know after desert that you're through.

Go on. You deserve it. wrote:

You've been putting up with her bs for 7 months. You deserve her gift and free meal. Let her know after desert that you're through.

After she has settled the bill, that is.