I'm a female high school runner, and realize that even talking about weight probably raises a bunch of warning signs about eating disorder, but I have some legitimate questions.
I'm 5'3'', 132 pounds. I know I don't look like your normal runner. If I could make myself taller, leaner, all the other typical attributes of a faster athlete, I would. I ran a half marathon recently, and my thighs chafed until almost bleeding because they rubbed together the whole time. My teammates all wear size xs or kids shorts and I can't do that. When I go home and eat a full dinner, one of my teammates just eats granola bars. I find myself doing unhealthy comparisons in my head with other runners - that girl's legs are more muscular but thinner than mine, why aren't my abs as defined as hers, and so on.
The thing is, I love this sport. I'm training like 35+ miles per week to prep for xc and now that it's July i'm bumping that up to 40+. I am by no means the best, but I'm also not awful (19:15 5k, 5:14 1600). I want to run in college. I want to improve and become stronger and the best that I can be.
I'm just worried that my best is limited due to my physique. No matter the effort and time and training I do, will I be limited in what I can do because of genetics? If I focus intensely on eating healthier and just less and getting down to more like 120 pounds, will that make me capable of faster times?