Joining a Country Club

provide more details,

give a hint as to where it is,

clubs have very distinctive personalities.

NY,

CHicago,

FL

Boston

LA

San Fran??

Initials of the club

But you're not doing it for your family. If you wanted to give your family a safe place to socialize, exercise and celebrate you could do it at the YMCA. What you are looking for, my friend, is social prestige. There's nothing wrong with that, but don't lie to yourself about it.

pdl wrote:

But you're not doing it for your family. If you wanted to give your family a safe place to socialize, exercise and celebrate you could do it at the YMCA. What you are looking for, my friend, is social prestige. There's nothing wrong with that, but don't lie to yourself about it.

With all due respect... They would likely get knifed at the YMCA in our city. Plus the YMCA doesn't have all of our friends.

I don't need social prestige, and I certainly wouldn't gain any from joining this cub. If anything it is expected of me.

I am not giving any information about anything.

It’s a nice thing for the family if the character of the members is what you want your family spending time with regularly.

Money wise it’s at least 1500 a month for me if you average it over the year. There are quite a few things you can do with 18k a year like retirement and your children's education. If money is not an issue and it’s where you want to spend your summers, go for it.

Open Question wrote:

I am not giving any information about anything.

Judging by your initial post, I can assume you are not Jewish, black, or Catholic?

If you are going to use it, and can afford it, then do it.

Positive adult role models and peer groups are key factors with kids growing up. Clubs can provide great athletic opportunities like tennis, swimming, etc. Golf is a game for old folks, but give your kids a safe place to play some real sports and maybe learn some manners.

Clubs are only worth it if you use it.

W A S P wrote:

Judging by your initial post, I can assume you are not Jewish, black, or Catholic?

Wow, that is offensive.

Sometimes Golfer and Laced Up,

I agree, and that is why I think we are going to do this. I think we can pull this off financially without limiting our saving, and we live in a climate where it would behoove us to utilize the club as much as possible.

Swim team, tennis, holiday celebrations and family time are the main reasons I want to do this for the kids. The club is not a large one, it is actually rather small in comparison to the other few clubs in our city. I like this due to the fact that most of the families know each other and tend to be of good character. There is not a lot of snobbery, despite what others might think.

The club does a good deal of civic work, and even organizes ways for the kids to do community service in a way that is fun and "cool" for them.

I can honestly see my wife and kids sending the entire summer out there, and that in itself is worth it to me. I don't like the idea of having kids sitting around playing video games, etc. I'd rather have them outside at the pool, courts, etc.

Country club life is not for everyone, but it can be a great place for making contacts, socializing, spending family time, working out, entertaining, etc. People that join primarily for the prestige and proceed to 'live' at the club are missing something in their lives, imho.

I belong to an exclusive club in Chicago. Use the fitness room three times a week (no waiting!) and otherwise go there a few times a month. We've been fortunate enough to provide my daughter with an unforgettable wedding reception and enjoy many of the perks without getting too caught up in it. I haven't regretted it.

Try a social or another class of 'limited' membership and see if it's for you.

I spent all of my summers growing up at a country club. I loved it. I learned how to play golf and tennis. I made great friends. My sister and I spent hours every day hanging out at the pool inbetween golf, tennis and swimming lessons 5-days a week every summer. I'm in my late 20's now, I'm really grateful to my parents and hope I can provide the same awesome opportunity to my kids.

Do it man, you will not regret it. You will be giving your kids something they will use and love.

Be honest. The point of a country club is for rich people to be able to pass on their privileges to their children unabated. By being a member of the country club, you and your family will socialize with other wealthy families. These contacts will get your kids into the good private schools even if the academics are a bit lacking (seen that first hand). These contacts will get your kids into good colleges even if the academics are a bit lacking (sister was an admissions officer for Ivy League university and saw that first hand). And upon graduation, your child's lackluster academic career will be excused with a job offer from one of your country club buddies (that guy is a few offices down from mine).

Would your kids be better off having to fend for themselves and earn everything in life? Maybe. Would the world be a better place if systems of privilege like country clubs did not exist and we all competed solely on the merits? Probably. Should you risk your child's future of good opportunities to try to change the world? Probably not.

Open Question wrote:

I don't really consider myself the Country Club type, but I grew up going to one, most of my friends belong and i want to give my wife and kids the same opportunities that I was given

Don't front. You're definitely the country club type. Go for it, it's who you are.

Precious Roy wrote:

your child's lackluster academic career will be excused with a job offer from one of your country club buddies .

why bother parenting at all? Precious Roy's crystal ball has your kid destined to be a dummy.

if you can afford it, do it. i joined one a few years ago and it's been great. it's pretty much a kid thing for us; swimming, water polo & tennis. i'll do the golf thing when i am too old to run fast, but i dont want to bother until i have enough time to do it often.

I appreciate all of the responses, thank you.

I am not fronting, I honestly do not consider myself the stereotypical Country Club type. We are not flashy. We prefer to own nice things, but only what we need. I drive a 2002 Honda, if that makes any difference to you.

I fully intend to make my children work for things in life, do not worry. I don't know many runners who aren't grounded in reality. I think that is inherent in most of us. Both my wife and I ran competitively in college, and continue to run today, so I don't really see us as the type that prefers a cushy existence.

Honestly, I want my kids to have the club so that they can feel a part of a close community growing up, while maintaining active lifestyles and hanging out in a safe environment.

Bonus that I get a place to work out, hang-out, eat, socialize, drink, etc.

Add to that the fact that we will have a place to celebrate holidays and special events throughout life. Everything from the Easter Bunny to weddings.

These are the things that make it worthwhile to me.

As a former employee of a local private country club, I can tell you this from personally witnessesing as a caddy and sometimes bus boy:

Most men in private country clubs get what they want.

Cheating on your spouse is alot more common at private country clubs.

If you have a good looking wife, she will get hit on quite often.

Forbidden fruit will be tempting. There will be plenty of hot young women who are married but will let you screw them...if you are rich or famous.

Chauvinism is rampant.

You will see many men and women with serious drinking problems.

Wealth does not matter on the golf course. Many very wealthy men cheat like you would not believe.

Pros:

Good food.

Good life.

Good golf course.

Tip your caddy well. If you get the rep of being cheap they will make up the differance from what they can find in your bag.

i did. i question the money occasionally. my family enjoys the pool, tennis, golf almost everyday all summer long that we're not travelling.

not needing tee times to play is nirvana.