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friendly advice
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 5/25/2012 5:03PM - in reply to off the leash Reply | Return to Index | Report Post

off the leash wrote:

Married again, don't give up! Be happy your husband still wants it from you. I know you want it to be different, though. I know exactly what you mean when you say you can't even give a hug without him wanting it. But again, think about the opposite situation, and which is better?



Make him wait for it. You're not his sex slave, you're his wife. Do it when you're good and ready. Do it on your own terms.
The Substitute
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 5/25/2012 6:04PM - in reply to friendly advice Reply | Return to Index | Report Post

friendly advice wrote:

Make him wait for it. You're not his sex slave, you're his wife. Do it when you're good and ready. Do it on your own terms.


This ^ is really good advice.

And for you husbands out there, don't be listening to your wives. 99% of the time they are rambling on about some boring sh!t about their day. Listen to them only when you are good and ready. Only when it is truly fascinating. Do it on your own terms.

Everyone, please remember, we are at war.
attack on the natural order
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 5/25/2012 6:11PM - in reply to The Substitute Reply | Return to Index | Report Post

The Substitute wrote:And for you husbands out there, don't be listening to your wives. .


Don't worry, they don't even when they pretend to be.
Out-of-Wedlock-Danny
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 5/25/2012 6:45PM - in reply to off the leash Reply | Return to Index | Report Post
Thanks for the thoughtful response, very helpful.

You sound like a mature spouse, which is a great example to strive for.


off the leash wrote:

[quote]Out-of-Wedlock-Danny wrote:

Can you go into detail or give example regarding some of these issues wives resent men for?

maybe working out the home while wife is spent rearing children, perhaps? men keeping body in tact and in shape, while children take toll on women's body?


In general, being taken for granted. Outside influences. I used to get annoyed about mother-in-law issues, which I didn't feel I had the "right" to, feeling like sex is just sex and not an expression. Not being listened to is a big one. I have felt like at times that there were 10 other men around me that found me more interesting than my own husband did.

Yes, women want to feel beautiful!!! In my case, I still have the body of a teenager (haha) but I spend a lot of energy trying to keep my appearance up. I want my husband to notice. I think in many cases, the women just give up. Or worse, they still care, but age isn't working for them. Confidence is huge. It is hard to feel sexy when you feel fat.

And guys, I know you have many things that you believe your wives should be doing better, but you cannot control people. You can only focus on yourself and what YOU can change to make things better.

I believe you get more of what you focus on. So find a few things you like about your spouse and roll with it![/quote]
The Substitute
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 5/25/2012 7:11PM - in reply to attack on the natural order Reply | Return to Index | Report Post

attack on the natural order wrote:

[quote]The Substitute wrote:And for you husbands out there, don't be listening to your wives. .


Don't worry, they don't even when they pretend to be.[/quote]

Also, learn English. It helps.
The Substitute is a Twit
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 5/25/2012 7:20PM - in reply to The Substitute Reply | Return to Index | Report Post

The Substitute wrote:

Also, learn English. It helps.


How would you know Mr. 3 word sentences?
unmarried dude
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff? 5/25/2012 7:24PM - in reply to need data Reply | Return to Index | Report Post
0 for the last 365 days.
The Substitute
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 5/25/2012 8:06PM - in reply to The Substitute is a Twit Reply | Return to Index | Report Post

The Substitute is a Twit wrote:

[quote]The Substitute wrote:

Also, learn English. It helps.


How would you know Mr. 3 word sentences?[/quote]

Twit apparently is unaware of the fact that the number of words in a sentence is not an indicator of whether or not the sentence is properly composed.

Jesus wept.
Ahhh... yeah
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 5/25/2012 8:25PM - in reply to off the leash Reply | Return to Index | Report Post

off the leash wrote:

Married again, don't give up! Be happy your husband still wants it from you. I know you want it to be different, though. I know exactly what you mean when you say you can't even give a hug without him wanting it. But again, think about the opposite situation, and which is better?


Exactly. You can always compromise but would happen if he is no longer interested in sex? Then what? I would prefer "frequent" versus "non existence".

And who says women who are older don't want it too? Carry on.
Mrs. M
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 5/25/2012 9:14PM - in reply to off the leash Reply | Return to Index | Report Post

off the leash wrote:

So what's gonna happen when that woman meets the man of her dreams? Sorry, I'm taken? By myself? Will she then have to divorce herself?


[quote]Mrs. M wrote:

Perhaps this is the answer for the unhappy women?:
http://shine.yahoo.com/love-sex/bride-marries-herself-more-singles-throw-solo-weddings-202200537.html

The unhappy men can just shack up with themselves. Oh wait, most already do!
[/quote]

Have an affair? Divorce herself, marry the guy then see herself on the side? That's a good option!
DSB15
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 5/27/2012 12:07AM - in reply to Mrs. M Reply | Return to Index | Report Post
I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching to geico.
blah-zay
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff? 5/30/2012 9:47PM - in reply to unmarried dude Reply | Return to Index | Report Post

unmarried dude wrote:

0 for the last 365 days.


Hmmm, Pre-nuptial shutoff?

I don't know what's worse.
There should be an addendum
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 5/30/2012 10:08PM - in reply to friendly advice Reply | Return to Index | Report Post

friendly advice wrote:
Make him wait for it. You're not his sex slave, you're his wife. Do it when you're good and ready. Do it on your own terms.


This is reasonable as long as you accept the fact that he will go elsewhere to have sex.

Look, you can either:

1) Provide him with enough sex to meet his needs

or

2) Accept a little help from other women in helping to meet those unmet needs


To think otherwise is to think that you somehow own his sex life and can do with it as you please (including eliminating it). To think that you have such a right is arrogant beyond belief.
playsfortheotherteam
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 5/31/2012 8:00PM - in reply to City Slickers III Reply | Return to Index | Report Post
This thread is one reason i am glad to be gay. When i want sex i just start rubbing my partner and i get what i want...sometimes, we just make it all about each other too, which is fun. I don't understand that eventhough women may not be in the mood that they can't do things for their spouses because they love them. Even if they have no desire for sex why no oral or even vaginal if it isn't painful? One of the great things about sex is a lot of it is in the mind and spouses should get pleasure in pleasing their lover. If not, there is something deeper going on emotionally.


City Slickers III wrote:

It's been 16 weeks since I had sex with my wife (thanks timeanddate.com)...and we haven't even been married 3 years. I think that's also the last time we "made out".

I'm pretty certain that after we sell our house, I'll be asking to end it and getting back to enjoying my life again.

No kids, thankfully.

I always feel like I'm in trouble ALL THE TIME with my wife even if I've done nothing wrong. I get yelled at for the most ridiculous things. I'd be curious to hear from some divorced men and if they'd gone through the same thing.
Haha suckas
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 6/1/2012 6:31PM - in reply to playsfortheotherteam Reply | Return to Index | Report Post
Married 22.5 years, not all of them good ones but the last several years very good.

Just got it for the third time this week--while I was cooking our dinner and one of our kids was downstairs on the computer.
notgonnabeme
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 6/1/2012 7:00PM - in reply to Haha suckas Reply | Return to Index | Report Post
I'm dating a girl who thinks sex is important. She says she wants to have regular sex when she's married. I guess I'm just lucky!!
off the leash
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 6/1/2012 7:05PM - in reply to notgonnabeme Reply | Return to Index | Report Post

notgonnabeme wrote:

I'm dating a girl who thinks sex is important. She says she wants to have regular sex when she's married. I guess I'm just lucky!!


You are not married. I think that's the whole point of this thread.
robert paulson
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 6/1/2012 8:37PM - in reply to off the leash Reply | Return to Index | Report Post

off the leash wrote:

[quote]notgonnabeme wrote:

I'm dating a girl who thinks sex is important. She says she wants to have regular sex when she's married. I guess I'm just lucky!!


You are not married. I think that's the whole point of this thread.[/quote]
Well he didn't say he was single, he only said she is.
go west
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 6/1/2012 8:44PM - in reply to notgonnabeme Reply | Return to Index | Report Post

notgonnabeme wrote:

I'm dating a girl who thinks sex is important. She says she wants to have regular sex when she's married. I guess I'm just lucky!!


My wife also said that she thought regular sex was important to a relationship. Now we're married & I've found out that regular for her means once a week, no oral for me or her, and only in the position she is most comfortable in (missionary). So my point is to clarify with your girlfriend if you're going to marry her.
Marriage Counselor
RE: Post-nuptial shutoff 6/1/2012 10:10PM - in reply to notgonnabeme Reply | Return to Index | Report Post

notgonnabeme wrote:

I'm dating a girl who thinks sex is important. She says she wants to have regular sex when she's married. I guess I'm just lucky!!


For whateveer reason, women generally lose interest in sex once they're married after some time. There are exceptions of course, but the odds are not on your side for a prolonged and satisfying sexual relationship.
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