Divorced after 12 years and much of the above; but I would say the shutoff came at 9-10 years and was due to stress and crisis on her part and me not handling it well.
I have been following this thread and feel compelled to finally contribute because I am now almost 3 years into a relationship and unbelievable sex with a beautiful woman.
I have carefully discussed and considered her history with her ex-husband, who was the only guy she ever had sex with (18 year marriage) and I believe he was the issue in the marriage and shut himself off after years of alcoholism and a significant affair. (I know him as well)
Her sexuality is far superior to my ex at her best, pre-kids, pre-marriage, but would things change after marriage even though we are both >40, done with kids, etc?
Any 2nd-timers who have had great success in this area 2nd time around?
I never thought I would say this because I belive in marriage, but what is the point 2nd time?